Military Wife

You'll think of me

2010-11-22T22:21:00.003-05:00

We are moving to Idaho!!!! I can actually say that were moving. We will be moving around august 1st in 2012. I'm so excited! We finally picked a place and we will have 12,000 to move also. We will be moving there for the sake of a new place. We actually have a family their very excited to meet us and were are known as the Johnson-Ransley family lol. we now gained a new last name and haven't even met the rest of the family. their excited to welcome us to their town and family events and such. Its great! this new transitional change will be a huge positive one.

So i have kept my word and been going tot he gym still. Sliming down for the military and I'm excited.

Sometime I feel like no one wants to know me or understand me and how im growing up. Like all the people i hold dear, there more like an acquittance than more. It's bad and i never see their faces I have to always plan things. Its well hurtful. Disappointed but Like I have said a billion times I don't have kids and thats the real excuse not bc i dont have any.

My husband broke his ankle and were getting that fixed also. He gets his cast tomorrow. its been little stressful at home but it will get better.

I think it is time for some scriptures

2010-10-31T18:03:00.002-04:00

I have started a new life. I have a different outlook on everything that I do now. I cannot think how I made it in my life without this great feeling from Christ, Holy spirit and god. My life has done an universal turn around. I need to get a holy bible to highlight and start reading more. Let the words flow out to me and note away for everything that will help me in my life. It is all in this wonderful book and I'm just waiting to have one in my palms. I should have one in like a week. YEY

Scott and I are doing amazing. We just got baptized. Its our new beginning to us together and individually. Were slowly gathering our social life back. I may have not seen family much lately but I'm pretty sure there upset and im being selfish in ways. I'm starting to get our life little back together and my family had me there growing up.Scott didnt and it feels some days with him every moment is so precious and I never want to let go for the love we share. Were are like so deeply in love, there are time we want to just lay in bed holding each other and not move. Just listen to our laughs snores talking silence and listening to his heartbeat. I know im still growing up and my family want to be there with me growing up. In my heart it lays else where.

That's one of my problems lately my heart has been laying else where. I don't want to be in this state any longer. I want to live in new places and explore. I feel I never going to get that chance. I have so many years to my life and i want to LIVE it. I want to take my school money I get in December and just drive out of state and come back for like a visit bc we can. We have so much here but we can have that anywhere. My life is my husband and my cats. You grow up and have your own family. I was thinking Utah or Idaho. I want to get up and pack and never come back for while.

As the winter comes I' have gained little bit of weight but over all this year i lost 30 pds. No one has complimented but my husband and my doctor. Winter time comes a bit harder to loose weight. I'm working on it because well, I'm joining the military when scott goes active. we wil be exploring everything. Oh yeah i forgot to share, I have my life planned out for once. I'm working on everything the best I can and I want to accomplish my goals.Scott gonna help me get over my phobia of guns. Gotta admit there little scary lol. I'm ready for life has to bring me. I want to go and live it up. Do things I never would do or see what I could never see anywhere else.

I love you all and I m happy with my life. so you should be too =]

hmm

2010-07-20T14:23:00.004-04:00

I really thought a lot about today and things. Im in a weird mood today. I'm happy i got to hear from my husband but that doesnt solve any of our problems.

Picture love flowing like blood.If hurt and pain are given to that love, it creates a block. Soon enough that block will get so big that there will be no flow. You have the choice, to tell the truth and knock the blocks down or let it stay there. But no matter what that flow will start again, but is it with you?

that i made up today. i thought it was pretty good. I may just start a twitter page to post that and see what people say.

Bleh

2010-03-10T17:31:00.003-05:00

So here is a fast update. Since i got to clean.

My dad was in the hospital. Talk about stressful but I'm glad he is okay and he has gave me another look on my life. I have been doing my best so far for a change. I wont be walking tonight but I will be on the Wii =] Some excerise is better than none! I also been watching what we been eating. We found we like wraps ALOT! obviously it counts what you put in them and we been watching that too.There so yummy. But i don't want to have a heart problem. I don't want to have diabetes. I don't want to be fat and I want to have children. Better my success is to make my self sucessful.

I have seen my nephews like a whole lot more lately and I love it! i haven't seen them in a week though so its due to see them again real soon!

School so far so good. I was told by my recruiter that whatever money I have left over from my school loans it would be split in half and equal payments out. Well it wasnt. I got 2828.75 for my first one and then 756.75 for my second. Granted I planned ALOT with the 2 grand. Depressing I know but now i only have 700 we cant get insurance on our car because we need rent. We can't do alot and i was going to use the big amount to move and that isnt going to be happening either. We need to move out of this place BADLY! our door thing is broken and we have mold growing in our spare room(not our fault). We also here a drip from the actic from time to time. It's shouting at us to GET OUT! So were trying. Oh and toliet bubbles from hell. Its evil too.

I got a tutoring side money job. I only get paid if the student picks me to tutor. It counts on the question and how much info to tutor. I only tutor one student so far the person needed on like 3 questions to math and i got $3.28. not bad really just wish more ppl would pick me! lol

Okay well I got to clean. SO CYA!

Oh forgot to post this. My husband NG place he goes to once a month, well a unit is deploying from grand ledge and also a unit in detroit. From rumor what he was told by saying this is rumor and rumor ONLY! They need 88Ms.That is scotts job. They are discussing if to take any from his NG place in grand ledge. Why there discussing this because there is a another unit from his Grandledge place that need 88M also. There is a high chance that they all or good portion will be deployed.It's in the air and RUMOR only.So don't be like omg he's deploying because hes not. Just more of information we would like to be open to and concerned alittle about. It's okay to talk about our concerns. but dont get worked up.

This sucks

2010-02-15T16:06:00.002-05:00

my husband is looking for a part time job he is trying to take basic training again and we have to let our car insurance go on our car because we have recently came down sick pretty bad and bought niquil our health comes before the car and I have successfully slept for 22 hours and im still sick and a bit tired. my husband is coming down sick now. So we are staying home till whatever of this passes over.
Our rent is going to be late this month because scots RMA's were pushed back because of the snow. So it will be late. he will be gone all t his week starting wednesday
i have started my healthcare classes. I haven't had time to start reading or anything but I'm working on it. I'm also waiting for my final grades of my last classes. Which they go by weeks and both of my classes had B's so my final hopefully will keep it a B or go to an A but we will see.
thats about it. I got a rose for valentiens day. just been home dont really want to pass on what we have. I can't wait till it goes away!!

Counseling Parts

2010-01-31T17:13:00.004-05:00

First arrived at counseling we had to explain how our lives were growing up. It was pretty basic if parents were home working or on drugs. Then after all that we explained if they argued alot or how they solved situations in life. Did we get things we wanted or were short on commings for even clothes. Things like that. Then he asked how we argued.
We argued badly. I yelled screamed slammed things walked around the house like i have lead feet, ignored my husband. told him to shove it. all he does is hurt me and all that bad stuff.
Scott explained his side. It wasnt pretty either.
THEN, we were told all those nasty things we ever said to each just dont. Drop it all. There is no point in the matter if I'm like my dad and he is like his. So starting that day no more of that. He told us that we are our own individuals and were not our parents. Were Scott and Laura. He then started talking about three tasks which we need to do to keep our marriage going the rest of our lives. To make it work or better.
Our first task was the penatly flag. If we started to uproar one of us ups and leaves with out explaination just go and come back in like 30 minutes and explain what upset us and why we argued in the first place to fix the situation and more aware. Not to talk about anything else that was passed the point why we argued.
Our second task was to make list. In a marriage people compliment the other couple and do nice things for them. In an average, a married couple does 1-4 nice things a day. Which isnt alot especally if its the person your married to. To help make this better you need to find out what is nice to you. So make a list of things you nicely recieved things and given things to that person. To show what we like and what we thought was our effort or being sweet. Then at the end of the day before bed switch lists and dont speak about it. Accept and learn by it.
Then every day after that you know what is nice by your couple and you can keep doing nice things for them. Which puts people in good moods. If you want every great while re do the list because people change and things change in life.
Task three One day out of the week dress up like a date and have one. If you cant afford one still proceed to dress up nice and have a nice dinner at home together.
Week two
Continue everything we are doing already and add a bit more.This week was about who has the stronger foot in the marriage. Which would be me. I'am the boss. Well that shouldn't be like that in any marriage. He called it the pac. Parent Adult and Child. Usually one is the parent and the other is the child. The child acts out while the parent says no. the number one thing in the marriage that defines the boss is bills. The boss does everything on taking care of things to make it work. This week you will want to sit down and share the bills and be an equal as adults. There will be situations where he will be asking for money or if its okay. You then will want to say, since he knows the bill situation what do you think? Which gives him the option to do so or not. He will then learn responsibility and be like an adult. I get to learn to let things go and stop being a parent and be an adult let myself do things.

Week three
was our sex life. sometimes some people want sex and hate bringing it up because they get turned down. it puts pressure on a person and a relationship and alot of people dont know that. So we learned to be more verbal if we want it. Or there are some other options I dont remember them all but I remember one scott and I are going to try. We havent yet, because it hasnt been needed. That is to lit a candle, if that candle is lit and the other person notices they have the choice of blowing it out or keeping it lit. So it works as a yes or no. Dont discuss pass that either.

i also asked a sitation between scott and I to make this whole navy situation better by asking him how he feels. In a relationship there is a fixer there always is. Do not fix it the situation by saying have you tried this or thought of this. just listen its what he wants and ask how does it make him feel.

Working it

2010-01-31T16:45:00.002-05:00

Well we have been extremely busy lately.
i want to go through today and explain some of the counseling my husband and I took recently step by step sort of so who ever is reading can learn and use in their life. We have a wonderful minister to help us. I believe he is a miracle person or just very smart but he saved our marriage. Like scott and i have never been so in love until recently. Everything between scott and i is like a fairy tale. It runs smooth and if we have a problem its calmly solved. If it decided to uproar to bigger we know how to stop it. Our minister is also getting scholarship classes for a 13 week course on management with dave ramsey. So that is going to help us alot too. They have been so greatful to us. If i wasnt so dead beat tired from this week i would of gone to church this morning.I truely believe this minister has changed our life for the good and is showing us in the right path of success.
But Scott hasn't turned his papers into the Navy yet, he said give me a week. He still wants to be a soldier and going from soldier to salior doesnt make him happy. I want him to be happy because this is his life career. If he doesnt want to do he doesnt have too. So he said give me a week he has to write a letter anyways to the army board he will have his answer. So I allowed that, this is life changing and a big situation. I hope that he finds himself and guides into the right direction in life.
This week I was a happy school girl on military post in Grand Ledge. LOL! I was shown around to everything his bed and his lockers and where they have the drills and vechiles he drives. It was so awesome. I was so happy grinning ear to ear scott was like wow this really makes ya happy? I go Oh ya its great. I love it. So it made him happy in return. We also had to pick up his W2 and that was the sole purpose of the drive but i got MUCH extra!
This week we did taxes, the lady at H&R Block was super dooper fast and I LOVED IT!
I currently been working out this week and lost 5 pds. WOOO! Go WII FIT! Scott has been working out too bc he needs to make it weight and tape. Go healthy us!
I went to my nephews basketball game and that was so much fun to watch. Waking up in the morning and watch em play has to set some one in a good mood because it was entertaining. But clayton did such an excellent job! I also got to see them for a visit, so seen them twice this week. That most definately made my week.
Scott had an interview this week. Part time at the lunch box. He would be on call.. till they see what is good of him. A girl there tried leading scott on to have sex... I could so deck that woman but I let it go. She works there. But the lady said she would call scott if he got the job.. So we don't know but the old lady that hires really liked him.
Counseling went great thursay. Our appointments are always on thursday, so we are approaching our last counsoling not this coming thursday but the next.He made a two week break to see how we would do.
We helped a dear friend this week had her for dinner and everything. That was nice. I m not going to mention a name incase she doesnt want me too.
We went to the police station for the forgein people that keep calling us.
I also stopped denying that I have talent and its useless, so I started drawing again.Can't deny who I'am right? I found anime my favorite so far. I have been loving it. I'm going to be start teaching my self how to paint with acrylic paint. that should be fun! One of these days I will have a few nice paintings in my life up on my walls to my house. that would be so cool. I will post a few drawing soon on here. Hope you like em!
Okay well I'm going to make one more post about the steps of the counseling and I have to get off of here and make dinner. Scott just went ice fishing caught one fish but it was something.
MUAH! Love ya all and take care.

On me

2010-01-26T17:45:00.004-05:00

Here is an update of my life..yey I think..
Well my husband is trying to go active. Not army but navy. Its safer shorter deployments and pays more but hes never done it obviously. Its not his dream to do so which sort of hurts but its not set in stone thing and he can get turned down. he can always go back to the army.
Im still doing school getting my grades up.
Were still poor. Our marriage counselor told me to share bills with my husband and we do and work things together not seperate. So we wanted me to total what I need to pay monthly that is consumers rent car insurance and water. We are negative like 345 a month every month. its sad.. But were some how making it.
we are still looking for a place to live. I have some hopes at an area in owosso that is income based. but our chances will take long and dont know if we can do it or get approved.
But with the navy scott still needs to fit weight requirments and everything. He will have to take basic agian. which that makes him happy. most of his basic is in water. we have to go to grandledge tomorrow to finalize paperwork on the navy switch over. So there is a high chance I will be gone or moved out the end of this year... he also could get rejected and not be able to active navy so we will see.
But im scared and i dont know where I life is going. I'm sick and tired of trying to make things happen, when I just want them to happen right. We get like no luck in life but for family and friends. makes things hard

Things are turning

2010-01-13T23:07:00.002-05:00

Well we got some one to do our marriage counseling for us for free. He is a minister he does short term not long term counseling. We don't need long term we just need to learn how to comunicate without all the nasty words yeliing fighting stomping through the house crying bullshit. all couples fight but theres a limit on where it should stop and we both need to be taught that.
Then scott is off doing days of work with the army night after night atfer night so we can make rent. Our rent went down 25 bucks if we shovel the sidewalk. Our car is breaking down piece by piece by piece. We now have a window wide open down cold cant roll back up freezing ass off while on highways. We still need breaks done and tires so we dont go plant our car into the neighbors back yard again like a decoration when were just trying to get out. Getting out was an understantment when we thought were having a bad time and then was in a middle of a yard and realized its much worse.
We also gotta move some how some way. were working on it..no one seems like are going to help us with income places and we barely have room for this small apartment and were looking at smaller ones... this sucks.
But my husband is on weight watch from the army and not allowing him yet to go active like always. They also ripped him of a job placement that he was placed a month before hand.
School is doing good and I'm getting my grades back up. I needed to learn how to focus myself again on school and juggle my life differences with school and not clash to were it affects my homework.
Our hamster passed away and we seen it coming. He was so cold for a few days and would barely eat to not eat and just lay and not move to gasping for air and then died. We were on the way to barry him when we realized that day that we stuck our selves into the neighbors yard and then relized our window was done with in one day.

So

2009-12-28T11:24:00.003-05:00

As everyone knows now, we are getting counseling.
Things are okay at home. It's not like were arugying or anything. Were not avoiding it but not bringing it up also. We will wait until something is taken care of with a third opinion in our lifes.who can successfully input on what would be better for us.
We mutually agreed upon the idea and are both decising on taking action to make us better.
We will be working on each other indivudally and together. when this happened we had friends to help us through our first night and im thankful for that being there when we contacted them. I know my family is there for me too and If i asked they would of done the same thing.
So I'm going to go play a wii game relax and sort of spend some quality time on myself.

nothing goes right for me

2009-12-27T18:56:00.002-05:00

so my marriage is crumbling and i cant stop it. were looking for marriage counseling and were are a bit seperated. his job will keep time a way and i will occupy myself when he gets back or leave and stay at a friends.
what a life. and i probably deserve all of it.

Update

2009-12-14T10:54:00.003-05:00

Well, We got our landlord to rip up our eviction and gave us the month free but we have to have rent the first of janurary which makes sense. It's only fair he tried pulling alot of shit on us.
We were adopted by a family to have a christmas. We were also given by walmart and texas road house gift certificates. So we got pretty lucky and Also we are looking for a christmas tree. We might find one this coming weekend when scott comes home.Were going to see if his aunt has one in the woods behind her house.
Scott gets the finalization on this job tuesday. the latest wednesday, and he will be coming home atleast one day this week as a suprise visit. He has been working out and loosing weight. We are discussing some things recently but i can't say if it will happen.Scott called me into a room this weekend and asked me about a deployment, how would i feel? I obviously cant say, dont go I love you too much to leave me. I told him without crying, I support whatever he signs his name on or does. He is my husband and this is his career. So he is asking at work this week about if he changes his MOS to fueler comes back and leaves with the deployment of his group if that was possible and/or okay to do. So if they say they like the idea and his dedication that he can change and head over with them he will be leaving in 140 some days overseas and even sooner for his MOS and if its not possible for him to come back and leave with the unit he will not be doing it. He is going to change his MOS in the army two more times though dont know when.He wants to combine MOS to get paid more and be more flexible to the army. He wants to be a mechanic, fueler and driver. So if anything happens he knows what to do.
But if they do say yes, I dont know how im going to react. We were planning a far way vow renewal. We wanted to visit new places together and have children. A deployment could end everything or make things harder/worse.It's scary. But we dont have an answer so, no time to worry about that!
Alright I'm going to get off to pick up around the apartment and clean. I have been sick lately. i have been sick alot this year, I'm not liking it.My school money is suppose to be coming in sometime this month more towards the end of it and If i get it before christmas than,I can get ppl christmas presents.

New post

2009-12-09T14:59:00.002-05:00

Well, we are doing great as a couple. But financially in the hole like always.
I have 6 credits from college now, I'm taking some new classes and I'm so happy that I also get a christmas break. Thankful for it acutally. Just need 54 more credits to graduate. So far things are pretty easy peasy.
We have a very angry/upset landlord. I have to take all decorations in my house down. I'm "ruining the walls" which is okay I guess, less for me to pack when we move. My husband is working on loosing weight so we can get out of this hell hole. Which im excitied for, I'am every time when he works to going active. I want to see the world. I can't help it.
This month I'm sending in my application to a tv show. I highly doubt I will be on there but thought I would give it a try.-if I do get it and succeed till the end I may just change my life career. But this is just a shot of 1 and a zillion. I would probably join the us army.
So we think we might have money all the money for rent next month. Scott got our landlord to rip up our eviction.That felt great but doesnt mean he cant get another. Sigh.
We were adopted from a family for christmas.I'm really thankful for that.We also had a charity in our name to make rent.
We are deciding what were going to do about some of our stuff when we move.Like storage alot and take minium everytime we move so we dont have much to haul around every year or so. So when we come back home to live our life, we will have a storage of old stuff from our younger lifes. We would really like that.
But so far we are looking for a new apartment that we can live at with being income based.
My husbands deployment was moved up from 2014 to 2012. It may press back again because of obamas recent plan.
But we are living. Were lucky our car is still going. We are just plain lucky.
But were living badly
But were happy together. I rather be homeless on the street with my husband than be in a home without him.

bummed

2009-11-07T22:07:00.003-05:00

I'm sitting and I relized im scared to death of what is coming in the future. i feel my life is stamped to change in 2014 and it wont be the same. Its hard to accept.
I love my husband so much. A life without him isnt a life. He isnt even prepared or ready to go overseas. He doesn't want to go. This year has flown by and I'm just realizing this year is ending and its only a few years closer. i'm even more scared where he is going to go. We dont even know yet. It probably will be korea and/or afghanstan and those places arent close to safe.
i have nightmares already because its annoying that they gave it this early so we can all dwell on it till then?Thanks!
Then usually when i have nightmare I end up having more than one. Like last night it took forever to fall asleep and then i dreamed my husband dieing and burying him. Woke up with tears to fall asleep again to be sitting in a vechile and i get side hit while driving not even expecting it and i had medics all over me checking me putting the breathing thing on strapping me on an orange stretcher for the helicopter and I could feel myself struggling for my own life. I woke up and gave myself a big hug to be alive. I woke up felt like i was barely breathing and out of breath.
Then i watched my cat scooter knocked over superman cage for a morning treat. It made me angry. Superman was shaking scared and i fed him his favorite treat. I changed his bedding while i was at it and then i put him in there. I put the stuff up and i turned around and superman comes up from under the bedding does his little squeaks and i pet him and give him a kiss. He made his bed and went to sleep.he such a good hamster. hes never bit us and he doesnt mind humans
Were still looking for jobs, I wont find out if we get financial aid yet till scott gets him, I got to slap him for scaring me this weekend like that. what a butt head.
Well I'm going to clean... even though its like 11pm no one else lives here why not lol

Yey

2009-11-06T18:08:00.001-05:00

I'm happy =]

Concerns and Issues

2009-11-03T11:01:00.004-05:00

I currently am not happy. Not a single bit.
i lost all my school funding. So i had to pull out full on a loan. Which pisses me off. But im thankful that i can still go to school. Which by the way sucks. My teachers are REALLY mean and SO LAZY. I countless tell them where my work is and to count it. So i tell them to do THERE job. I shouldn't have to do that
By the way my husband doesnt work. I dont work which equals zero income into our family. Which no one has bothered to hire us. NO ONE. Were poor and we cant get help from the state because we dont have CHILDREN. I'm sorry I can't pop out babies, so therefore I'm worthless and will sufer till no end on struggling in life. Because frankly thats all we do. Struggle and never get a break Not once. We cant have the job of our life time because god will only make sure we only work it a month and say good bye.
We dont have rent money, We dont have consumers money. Oh btw my consumer is officailly over a grand. I will expect our heat to get turned off bc the state is too lazy. Thankful we have food but have no gas money to get food. We had to withdrawl negative in our bank for scott to make to his one weekend a month this weekend. He is going to try to apply for army assistance in our life. Oh also were so poor my husband is also asking for an MOS change and we are taking anything we can get our hands on that will bring in income.
Oh and then our car was broke into again. They took our change and put this HUGE dent in our dashboard. And made our car messy. They didnt leave anything to minimual on our door to get in. You know its not like we needed the money right? Or our car. I dont even want to start on our car we have been months without brakes. its real bad.
But were living

I adore him

2009-10-17T16:55:00.002-04:00

I love my husband, I really really do.
Days like these I know are probably going to fade away in the future but last night and today. Was really good. We sat talking to each other for like hours i mean till 330 am talking. I loved it. We were laughing sharing things and beating each other up.
We are realzing were getting old, or just not noticing things as much. Like the other day we were in the store and we argued before we went to the store and then someone is like whats todays date ? the lady said 10 10 and I was like omg that is our "special anniversary" that we made up a long time ago, because being married when you started dating doesnt really matter so we changed our date to our special anniversay.Completely forgot and that isnt us, so we got out of line that day and went to bannans and used our bridge card to get some fat steaks. We made sure we celebrated atleast alittle bit.
Today we woke up this morning to Jasmin being in heat. UGH! I hate it I mean she isnt loud or cries. But she walks around and makes like loud purr sound and constantly bugging scooter. We have to split them up alot because scooter things he can hump her. Its ridiculous and scooter was fixed early. I never gave him a chance to know anything. So i cant wait till she gets out of heat
Other than that, im going to clean because i never got to firday and now i need to start today. And I got my homework done i need to turn that in before I get off. So CYA

Annoyed but happy

2009-10-15T17:53:00.003-04:00

Were annoyed how our living status is right now. It's disgusting. We dont like how we are. We miss having a job that i think we earned in our family.
I'm sick of family, Certain family members. Not everyone in general. Like people who go to other peoples weddings and not ours bc they dropped out last minute. That really hurt seeing that.
I'm getting really sick of people who talk about everything else but them. Like we come to visit them but here stories how alittle girl says things.Not even there child. We came over for you not them. But now that has changed and we put the biggest burden on there life. Frankly were not staying long for christmas or thanksgiving and will only be visting one person and leaving. One person that is rather important to us.
Oh and I just loved how we were sitting in the hospital because of me and they were pissed that we didnt show up. So we come over and hey i just found out where we were and they were still pissed or undecisive. Because we can pick up our imaginary phone and call you, In my opinion some one needs a reality check and shouldnt get lost on taking care of some one elses child maybe start a life of your own and maybe have a family.
Also another comment to that, I'am down right sicken of getting treated wrong. Not tolerating it. You only care about Scott because I'm married to him, we dont have children and yeah sorry i dont pop out babies like everyone else, so how about you treat me like family than scott just fucking some one. Because I'am his wife part of the family by marriage your going to have to deal with me. When we have kids your not getting them as much as you get some one elses. You will barely get them unless Scott and I agree so to feel that your able to take care of them. Since were on the baby subject, I'm really annoyed with everyone that doesnt put any effort into scott and I. You know there are alot of couples who dont have kids and yet, since we dont we dont get visited much from alot of people because there is no meaning to see us. I tell you what, things will come back and be remembered when we do start to have a family on our own.
I truthfully care for people who put input in my life. If you dont bother, you dont see us. I will sit and have a conversation with any one and set up dates or be curious make random visits, but if nothing is in return. Why bother? Your going to have to exist in my life as much as as i exist in yours.
The thing is, the only people that have done that since we have lived in owosso is my parents. They are my friends and yet my parents. I really like it and im really bummed that winter is around and we cant go out and play disc golf but when it comes around they better be ready.
I also have to do some learning on to use my ankle again, because by the look of it i dont have an ankle still and i think its broken but its not swollen and only hurts in certain ways.So im going to have to build up some new muscle or something to protect it a bit. alittle bit of rehab on it. i really screwed it up.

But other than that, the last two days i have worked out. done school work and havent have too much time to clean. So our place is dirty. its gross. I hope to have something done by the end of tomorrow.
i know i complained alot but im sick of people treating me like i dont have feelings or that were just a couple so whatever. its annoying
Its weird how if we compared my side to scotts side, mine is starting to have more of an advantage.Can you guess the advantage?

tiny update

2009-10-04T13:25:00.002-04:00

im been doing school so far, its pretty easy but ill know it will get hard sooner or later. its school
scott doesnt have that job any more because it all depends on the state budget and by the end of this month they need to come up with a plan. so if the place doesnt get what they want or get cutted down then they cant afford scott. so hes jobless but has an interview on tuesday at dunhams. he can still go back to little ceasers bc he put his orders in there. but its our last resort because we cant afford him working there. And then if he doesnt get orders to come back to that place at the end of this month, were back on trying to get active but out of state active again for like the hundreth time.
I wish I knew how student loans worked out or when i get money because its going to be needed around here. I didnt ask for much just enough for the book fee they do for your online books and little extra.
also scotts group got a deployment date moved. it use to be far far away and now its like only 5 years away but things always happen between there. 2014 he is getting deployed to gods knows where if he is just national guard still by then.

Good Morning

2009-09-09T10:38:00.002-04:00

So, I'm bored and don't really want to clean. Our landlord has been working on our house like for MONTHS and he still isnt done. He just took one of my windows out and border up and there are nails through it.

Recently scooter got outside but we found him, i dont know if I posted that at all.

Tomorrow I have school shit to do. I'm excitied. I just want in but for the free year school pratically I have to wait..It blows because alot of people want it set up. It's like a 6000 thing. Military Families get it. It is only allowed to go to school classes. Which is awesome!

I have been looking for a part time job, but im scared to get one. I don't want to over do my self with things. I want to do amazing at school be on the dean list and all. Or try my hardest.

Well, I'm going to get off to get things done. My place is wreck because when scooter went missing we through everything EVERYWHERE! we tipped our dresser over, we tipped the bed and tipped over the couch.

A life without my kitty is hard. He is my buddy. Ever since Dad told him to take care of me while he is gone. He does. It sounds weird but he does. Like if I get bummed out on the couch,he notices comes running and meows and lays next to me or ontop of me lol Like this morning Im laying on my side, he runs in climbs on my side all the way up to my face and he will sniff your face those are his kisses. then he will push his face against you and thats his hug. then this morning I also looked up and there was jasmin stealing a good quarter of my pillow, but she was next to my head being a good girl.

We slept the night while he was gone on the kitchen floor next to the door just to expect to hear him.

glad to have him home. things wouldnt been right at home without him around

Waiting

2009-09-01T15:11:00.002-04:00

I have been trying to get into this University for about a week now to get things set up and i just found out that sent me to the wrong person, they sent me to there buisness program and not there health and thats why they were having a confusion with me because I have been asking for healthcare. So after we got this cleared I have to almost start all over again BLAH!

Okay other than that, Scott and I are really low on food, but we are making it. I think we have enough before we get food stamps. Thats if even if I have food stamps. Because last time I knew they ended yesterday. Yes I have contacted my case worker and got nothing. We wont be needing food stamps soon. Thank god, because I'm sick of going through the state. It was nice when we were off of it before.

Other than that, were pretty happy. I just started today a new blog. Its a cooking one. Just some things. Scott and I have ate. Give ideas for people or anything like that. Posting what I know is good =]

Maybe get something from it

But were living and at home and bored.

Update

2009-08-27T10:27:00.002-04:00

Scott is home obviously, We been pretty busy like always.
We closed a lot of contacts in our life,Sorry. Some things were going on that were totally sick of and it takes one person to talk. To start it all over again. We don't want stress in our life, other than what we bring on ourselves. So, keep it to your self.Oh and we don't want to help.
Other than that, Scott's army job is doing great. We are looking to moving when he signs on permanent. Yes my husband has a new job. Were guessing it pays like 650 a week. So if he doesn't get it, we will go back to little caesers because they have to keep that job spot open the rest of his life. So at like 45 years old Scott still can go back and get that same job. But he was told that his temporary will be permanent in his sign up for like 45 days or something. He likes it a lot. Every week he gets 3 hours to work out,during work hours. He really likes that he's been working on toning himself.
I'm on the other hand want to go to school. We were this start of the year but I thought we were moving,but were not. So yeah, we are looking to relocate, like i said if he gets it.
But if he doesn't we are paying people off in case something happens we can turn to them and catch up on some bills. pay rent a few months ahead. If we have enough Scott will get his 360 back that he ALWAYS brings up. But the car IS getting done.
I'm cleaning I'm waiting for the dishes to dry. Were stealing internet, I love when people don't lock there wireless.
Oh ya Scott's job hours are like 8-4 but it takes an hour drive, which is like 50 bucks a week on gas. So he is home about 5 every day and everyday he has dinner on the table to eat and then relax. It's such a set schedule I LOVE IT! It's what I have been wanting him to have. This job he has is the dream job of us having for so long lol
But I got to go, finish more dishes! Too bad there isn't many.Just dinner dishes and icecream bowls.
Oh once we start getting paid money we will be visiting people much more. Sorry, just were highly tight on money and are barely making it, till he gets paid.
Oh we have health insurance!
Take care everyone

tired

2009-07-22T16:42:00.002-04:00

Im so sick and tired not having power at my place I called her multiple times.
im really tired and wore out, sleeping is alittle hard to do. Jasmin fights with a cat everynight through a window so i put them up so they cant then the neighbors kids running around. Then the landlord nailing boards on the outside of the house.
i cant wait to move
I want dave to get better. And I want scott to see his dad and I want scott home.
Scotts having quite fun, which is good.
want want want want.....lol
I cant wait, i want out of the states but where?
Alaska does sound nice,but i dont want to be near family when i move.
BLAH BLAH BLAH, I'm eating dinner and going home.
So i can sleep.
Take care

my husband

2009-07-15T13:25:00.003-04:00

my husband is deciding to argue with me over a pancake and hes acting like a 15 year old girl.Its rather stupid and im wasnt going to tolerate it and left. so im visiting my dad. Then tells me im taking sides. RIDICULOUS!
Well other than that we were told we will have him going active the papers in two months that makes us happy, doesnt seem like it especally today but were happy. dont know where were going. We are taking our extra money to fix the car in the next two months and we havent decided if we are going to start new or take some of our stuff.
But other than that its a big update
Scotts dad had a bad day yesterday and he cant really talk and when he did only swear words came out..which is weird but it happens. i couldnt tell you if hes going to make it through this or not and i only hope he does.
well i got to go maybe go to my husband or ignore him all day for his childish behavoir over a pancake. hmmmm what a decision.

edit:
Our friends ryan and laura are out of town. Which is good because i cant afford to see them and its less stress on us. we dont need that, I got maybe a few hours of sleep again last night. nothing is going right as in our living status but shit happens.And now we also have time to hang out with our friends that we couldnt bc we were always busy. so im happy

update

2009-07-14T14:16:00.002-04:00

Scott's dad is back in the hospital and had to get surgery. His brain is bleeding out whatever is in there through this tube and draining.
Also our tire popped cant afford a new one till next month. Means im pretty much not going to ride around on the vechile for 2 weeks of sitting home because when scott gets back from his army 2 weeks he has to run on it enough for work. its a spare so we are doing what we can. i knew something was going to happen
then we were at ryan and lauras and they come in un expected and started packing her mother was talking alot of shit. So whatever i bet my place is cleaner than hers. but we arent going to be seeing the god son much of anything bc were poor. frankly i dont even see how were going to make it to the baby shower and were probably not. We are doing what we can and his dad is more important in our eyes.hopefully we took care of the place good enough for the them, we did the best we can under our circumstances.
But other than that harry potter showing is tonight and we will be in line in a couple of hours for a midnight showing. so we can get a good seat. But were fucked all around and always will be

busy

2009-07-10T15:52:00.002-04:00

scotts grandpa and dad have been in the hospital. his dad brain is bleeding and grandpa been having problem breathing and thought he had a clot in his lung. So we have been going from saginaw st johns lansing house sit he works buidling a deck at grandpas and then sleep when we can and keep on moving. we got new windows in our house they are amazing. we were late on rent but he didnt charge us we have been a week without power. i have to wait till i get a paper in the mail for an appointment and then i will see then. it sucks.
but its our life and that is whats going on. im going to go shopping with my mom and have fun! so peace

tonight is going to be a good night *dance

2009-06-30T16:37:00.002-04:00

Yeah well i should be happy, I dont have electricity! I also wont have gas soon! I will have only water! WOOOOO thats so what i wanted, Scott and I breeched our agreement with consumers energy because we werent sending in the EXACT amount we were sending what we could in with there payment plan we told them its going to be hard what they set up we thought were doing good we were off 8 bucks on our last argeement and like 10 last week and well we are breeching everything we agreed and signed too. So we dont have anything
I dont even give a shit, im not going to be sad pissed angry i screamed once and thats the end of it.
i have that song stuck in my head tonight is going to be a good night some thing something something haha its from the black eyed peas *dances*
fuck consumers!!
But yeah had a pretty good day today I have to move all of my food to my friends house to put in the fridge and label. we need candles so we can see.
well i got to go give ya the update woo hooo *dances lets live it up

hopes and praying

2009-06-27T17:44:00.003-04:00

tell you the truth i have been trying SO HARD to have a better life
still am and im praying for things to get better
my husband is up for maybe a minium wage promotion which would be AWESOME! but hasnt got it yet so whatever
our god child is a boy! he was born thursday i think it was. laura came down with an infection and it was spreading so they had to pull the baby out. he is fighting so hard. his name is nolan. we wont get to see him till the 5th bc were so strapped for money we went there once and we couldnt even afford were trying to make it up still today. but i cant wait till the baby gains weight and is healthy enough to leave that hospital with mom and dad. I dont know how there getting home or anything or get around for there appointments and stuff bc babys have alot and were not super people to take them everywhere.they do need to find a transportation for themselves because we arent super people. we live in a town with our family and we have a lot of doctors appoints and running around my family lacks us.so will our friends. i know that we took this duty to be god parents but there is a limit and were scared and we want everything to work out fine and have time for everyone but not everything works that way you dont get what you want
just we moved ito this town for a reason and lately we havent able to keep up with it. were wore out and stressed.
next week is our diet tuna tuna tuna tuna. acutally is fresh fruit vegetables tuna and water and thats it. im excitied. we know some one already that gave us this that has already lost weight and a healthy amount in a month so that and excerizing i dont have a bike and its been much harder to get out. but i have been here and there.
this year is going to suck and be hard but im ready! i want out i want to start our lifes the way we want it.the things we want and be out of debt and pay people off for once
scott friend teaching scott guitar its awesome
but our last big event before scott leaves and when the weight is gone before he leaves is too go to cedar point and maybe up north and tube down a river drink and relax
but i got to go blah!

Well

2009-06-22T12:37:00.003-04:00

Our life plan has changed again.
I didnt want my husband to go over seas. Is that so wrong? If he put his name on that list then, well...it could be good...maybe.
So we came up with an idea since we have so many options.
Scott and I need to loose weight. So far I have a couple inches off my wasit but then my bike broke and now i have been lazy again so those are more likely coming back but i have been feeling great.
But we are moving on. Scott is going to loose the weight to go full time and go through a different person and leave. He has to loose 40 pds. so not that bad but we are already on a new eating schedule starting the 6th of july we have it set and we have been clearing out things.
While he goes full time I'm staying behind for about a year for me. It's him leaving and me choosing to stay for once. I will be going to a faster medical school so i can get in and out. I will have a 10 weeks of externship then im done. Once that ends, im leaving state to go live with my husband. it will take 30 weeks for my Medical Adminstrative Assistant degree. I havent decided a flint or lansing campus but i can say that this is going to be hard and long. I will have school live alone again and loose weight. I dont want my husband not to get a promotion because his wife is heavier than most of the woman. Because that can happen. It looks bad upon scott like he doesnt take care of me. So we dont want that. MY schedule will be nothing but packed but thats okay. Im sick on how we are living and i want out of it. So does he. Were getting out and making our self better and we may hurt people on the way, leaving and all but its for us. Not them =/
But there ya go, i had some test at baker this week but im not going. i would love too but it would take way to long to go there and i cant do that.
No pressure right? I have one chance to get a degree and not fail..LOL no pressure.
I could do it i know i can. Laura did it so can i!
Well i got to go ttyl

yey i think

2009-06-16T17:12:00.002-04:00

were are making bills better with an ease and not having to sell. that is nice but we did have to borrow which is the worst!
But were happy.
My husband is doing something daring next month and im soo soo soo soo scared but if that is what he wants im not going to stop him.
but other than my husband stressing me haha we been good. scott made 51 on tips the other night he was the only driver but we cant even enjoy a dollar of that because we need to pay car insurance
but since my husband is doing something that will make him not be around much more longer when the duty calls hes gone so, we are in august going to cedar point. they also are having a super deal on military family discounts so were going to take advantage of it, its one reason why they keep showing military people in there commercials
not everyone know yet what were doing and scott could change his mind before his two weeks in the summer next month so the date for him is next month
the past two weeks i have been bike riding and in two weeks we will have a group bike riding to st johns. working to a healthier life.
but i got to go bye

Go team Go!

2009-06-10T10:14:00.002-04:00

Well Scott and I are doing okay, still behind on bills. Like always and barely making it. Havent able to sell anything yet for the month, we also have new neighbors down stairs.
We are 0-3, yeah it sucks but today they have another game and it is in oakley yesterday was durand. we suck alittle bit,but were getting much better. They were alittle slow but once warmed up they got 6 runs in one inning.
I just ironed on PT on scotts coach shirt and then im going to visit with my dad and then probably stay long enough to see my mom and then go home and clean. then get ready for the game and pack dinner.
the last 5 days i have been bike riding atleast a few miles. Scott jogs next to me. then i rush home get the car and pick scott up and its been nice lol
well got to go im going to eat some eggs yey
take care everyone

OutRAGED

2009-05-29T09:55:00.003-04:00

My husband was jumped and im pissed.
I want to do something about it and the owosso police department held off his treatment because he was hit in the back of the head and they proceeded to investigate him for a hour and half then he was in the mri and cat scan then right after he came out of the room he was escorted by cops and proceed to his room and did more investigation. They spent maybe less than a half and hour on treatment and the rest on what the hell went on. He took a report from my husband who didnt even knew who he was! he didnt know me and then when they gave him medication he didnt remember anything and moffit was making like he was lying to him.I swear if a cop came to my house today i will escort there ass off my property.
I couldnt see my husband until 10 pm we took him in at 6. I wasnt allowed. I got in the police face, I was pissed. Then when scott was getting test done i was under for invesigation with moffit. before that i was talked to. after moffit seen me i was talked to again and then they made me go to the car repeat the dam story show the car and explain everything on our car and where it came from.
I want to go to penbrook and check who is hurt and kick the living crap out of them.
RAWR Im angry. I'm outraged. Living in this town is hard enough but when things go wrong its even harder. I dont want to live here I cant wait to move. Our landlord only expects a year for i dont know why.

I feel crappy

2009-05-21T19:51:00.003-04:00

I dont feel my self. I recently got a kitten and Scott and I were fooling around and I got up to go to the bathroom and step on the kitten. I didnt see him it was in my shirt you couldnt tell it was on the floor. And careless me steped on my shirt and I felt a crunch and knew it was bad real fucking bad.
He is still alive and he face is swollen and bruised and we think he is blind he doesnt have much use of his tongue,his tongue is a different color we wont find out till tomorrow morning is he needs to be put down. Today he got shots for pain and inflamation, we didnt have any money and our bill was 70 some dollars and they gave us a military discount of 26 bucks nad our bill is like 50 some which isnt bad and we can make payments with them. They bent over backwards when we showed up with him. The vet wasnt in and got called in. They were so nice and so right.
I cant sleep well I feel it in my foot the crunch I can hear it I can remember seen blood seeing his miss blance seeing everything ever so bad and seeing happy pictures I took before It happen its eating me away but i got to pull my self together and i have been but what i feel inside, i can never ever forget. i feel bad and i feel disgusted but he had a good life if he lives and i love him so god dam much. my eyes were puffy this morning i took minute naps all day crying and waking up and hating my self and my feet then falling alseep. i dont know how were going to survive with bills now bc they keep racking up.
We have argued more since we have been in this town. I have to get rid of Soldier. We sold our 360 our tv dog crate borrowed money selling again this month. Two people have died. And now this. I havent done anything wrong and sure in hell isnt karma. But im sick of this and want to live good and happy and fine.
But i got to go to take care of him
bye

Here it is

2009-05-15T23:33:00.002-04:00

Update on iPod touch

Were still struggling
Scott off at his one weekend a month
We saved a kitten recently,just learned how to walk. We named him Oliver or short for ollie. He is 3 weeks old. Bottled fed and have to wipe his butt unless to go potty LOL it's gross but it will go away when he is older.
Scott and I have been struggling in our relationship. It's been better lately. It's nice but ever so hard.the little things do it like saying what wrong twice a day and get claimed for being rude or mean.
If Scott and I lived out of this town we would be better off,sadly
still trying to make it in our life.
We sold our tv and bought another LOL but it's not as good as our old one we sold. We got it for 50bucks
We have tv for about a month then our tv is useless bc of the switch.
We got a new couch it was free and it's awesome!
We had our anniversary early and are doing our anniversary like any other day when it comes how thrilling
We are thinking of some ideas to better our selves in owosso almost near impossible
Scott doesn't work at meijers anymore and little sucks they do everything wrongthere and don't explain anything and chose to do what they like bc supposively to them we are claiming 4 on federal they have had our plate wrong and other bull crap but good people work there we may be borrowing a good junk of money there for someone to make it this month
So our first month here we borrowed from grandpa
Our second we sold our tv to make it
Our third month is now and were borrowing from some one else
God sure does love us!!!!!
But were content as we could be in this town and we need to visit more
Between coaching baseball teams helping people out working and whatever else happens some times people just come pick us up and pay for a night whatever they please LOL those are a load of fun sometimes except when we get kidnapped and don't take our vechile and can't leave when we please
Oh and my cats are very angry with the new addition
But that's my complaint update
Been reading more and I set up a library card so I can keep my boredum rolling into something good I'm finishing my meyer book last of her sequence and I'm starting on Anne rice now there is some of her books look really good
But I'm tired so good night
Take care

Trying my hardest

2009-04-25T11:48:00.003-04:00

This blows. Today I have to pull things out to sell,if we make this months rent that would be awesome! Because I wouldn't have to sell my jelwery ,I'm getting everything I have priced. If we made this month then we could start paying people off! This blows atleast I have atleast a week to make rent. I'm texting to make a blog like a phone and taking forever to write this month. It's so hot in our apartment it hit 84degrees in here so far,freaking hot and we dont have a screen door and only two windows open up.ugh!yeah so Scott I'd gone with his baseball team they have a scrimmage today he's assistant coach with mike our old roommates. But I got to go now,going to take a shower
Take care everyone

OH YA!

2009-04-18T18:25:00.002-04:00

Our new life plan, i get my two years of school done and pass it. HOPEFULLY! I will do so great i will hit the dean list over and over again. That would be awesome. MY goals.
But Scott will go to school also with me. Like our back up plan. Incase things dont flow through.
But here it is, We are here in town to be close to everyone we know because we are going to try to go full time once I graduate. When that is done see you later! We are going full time and some people will just have to understand. It's our life and its our choice and this is what we are doing.
So we are going to go Active Military, when I graduate we are going to live on base so everything is paid and he works and I will be working and we are going to save. Because everything we make is a luxury not a bill.

been awhile

2009-04-18T18:09:00.003-04:00

I'm just posting to say we are living.
Scott lost his battle buddy and hes been down. Hes getting better. We are very poor.
Thankful my mom lets me do laundry here!
Food wise were good. we are trying to get the state to pay our rent. Scott has been hired into Little Ceasers for a month and hasnt worked a single day. they push more excuses than anything.
He makes 280 average at meijers. doesnt cut rent thats for sure.
We are hanging with Stacey and mike again and well, i think they want something or are up to something. but it takes to find out we only hung out once.
We also been busy with our friends and what not. Feel like were using people. Every week im at my parents twice a week, scotts parents about twice maybe three, then about every week or other week with justin and adam and every 1 to 2 day a week with laura and ryan. And now so far once a week with stacey and mike. That doesnt include the time scott works or doctor appointsments for our friend .So, alittle busy dont ya think? But we like it. We would like to see some more family but I dont see that happening.
We are trying to get our rent or atleast half of rent paid by the state that would be great we make less than 7 grand a year. So I dont see why not?
But were happy as a couple day by day its different but Hey its our life now. We were meant to be here thats for sure. We have a phone number its the states. Safelink i get minutes every month by them. It helps with work calling in to say to come in.
Thats an update. It seems we do things good so we dont get karma but look at us we get shit on still and we been doing this for AWHILE. Goes to show karma doesnt really freakin exist.
Army also took two checks of scott this month so we have about 160 for rent whoo hoo. and only half of what they took is getting remimbursed.our luck.
But take care everyone
I cant wait for school!

No Internet

2009-03-25T16:30:00.002-04:00

We have no internet and were at my moms at the moment using hers.
We borrowed money to make rent in our apartment. Thank you Grandpa.
Scott is working two jobs and were are heading to college. But thats about the only update I have. We are not leaving state and probably never ever will.
I wish we had money to get things fixed. Were living back on the state, We will be receiving food stamps on the 9th. Our first month we will get up to 500 in food stamps and then every month passed that we will be getting 370. So that is fairly nice.
My husband and I have been pretty grouchy together. Days come and go for us to sit next to each other and be happy or joke. But it happens.
Other than that I'm getting off of here, I have another busy day.

Better In A Way

2009-03-17T09:35:00.002-04:00

Things are a bit better, Adam is doing better. Justin and Scott really got him to laugh and showed he was having a good time with his friends. Which worked out perfectly because we visited again to give him jerky and he was in an up lifted mood.
We screwed up on bills so much, Scott and I just couldn't take it any more. Everything kept getting worse and worse. So we took off up north and stayed the night in our car. It was alright not the best thing in the world. It really screwed our bills up and its in question of if we can make rent. So whatever, there bills right? But were selling a few things.But to me putting us behind in debt doesn't matter half as much as us going up north and letting go whats bothering us from the inside out. i came back to town feeling 10 times better about things.
But I'm going to guess Scott and I will be rich in the next three years for sure.Top maybe four years.Everyone will just have to see, I'll talk more about it later on.
Our temperature in our house is now set on 45 degrees. So yeah were so cold constantly. Every time we use the bathroom our toliet is freezing. We take a shower it has no effect it gets you warm in the shower but really cold when you step out.
But we are staying in Michigan and Scott is going to stay reserve. Even though I really bad want to go and leave we are staying. All because Adam will hate us and blame me, if we do.
So were coming up on how we are going to live in michigan the rest of our lives and even probably in Owosso which is like my total nightmare from hell. All because of Adam...Wasn't in my plan for this to happen but its happening.
But other than that we are living at the moment thats about it!
Take Care Everyone

Wore out

2009-03-13T22:06:00.003-04:00

Scott is gone visiting with Adam to make him better. He has not admitted himself and I dont know yet if plans on it or what not how if adams taking it any better. But I do know I'am at home doing all of the house work and currently taking a break from hand washing clothes which is so tiring. Your arms get tired after so many pieces of clothes hands start hurting from every tight twist to rinse and your back hurts because your kneeling at a tub that is dead on the floor and its very wore outful lol
Scott is now currently looking for another part time job. We are going to try to see if he can get a part time in for little ceasars which would be nice. Or atleast some where else. They are giving the hours or are calling any long lately. totally makes me angry. I can't do as planned on getting a magic jack at the end of this month because we are dead poor. We are acutally using it towards tags. The tags are in my name but Scotts birthday. I would have to pay two years for it to switch into my name, I checked into that while we updated our address on our license. We still dont have insurance tags in our car.
I have to sell shit to atleast make a payment on bills this month. TOTALLY blows.
But other than that we are stressed wore out at home, hopefully I will be able to start unpacking and what not.
My neighbors have been getting on my nerves.But I have to deal with it. But I'm REALLY HAPPY that our neighbor is a minute man in bed. Because it would be sooo annoying if not.
Hmmm I think I have hit everything that I need to talk about. Other than I'm really fucking cold. We are almost about to turn our heat off completely. Were so screwed living in this place.
Well next load of clothing.
Take Care Everyone

Still Pouring in My life

2009-03-12T22:05:00.004-04:00

That's right when it rains it POURS! But its not stopping here. Were flooding and i give about two more days we could be drowning.
We went to the funeral today, Adam straight up told he isn't doing good. It's VERY well to be expected. But through the day it got worse, he drank about 20 beers and counting. He is eating. He can't take the pain. Adam has never cried over his pain on anything. Scott of MANY years of knowing his life seen adam shed only one tear.scott can tell you to this day. I mean a tear. Adam has cried alot, he gets angry. He punched the stall off the VFW. He lets his anger out by fighting. He wants to blast out at any one and knock them out. Blame them. That is what he wanted to do during the mid day. Everytime he got a thought in his head, he was downing a beer and shots. We proceeded to his aunts again, (which i thought it was his grandma but its his aunts) Then he finally settled down sat kate and his aunt into a room, now he is going to put himself in a mental place. He wants to be up there with his mom and he cant control his emotions. He isn't will not be himself. So now I have Scott that wants to be there everyone second of his life for that not to happen. I totally understand. Scott hasnt broke down he is upset he cant help his friend, upset that his friend lost the only thing that matter to him because he was a momma boy. He just cant take it. Now Scott dealing with the loss. our sitaution. and now his best friend that is really loosing it. Scott doubting himself of being there enough for him. Not trying enough. Even though being there alot is showing that he cares and is there trying.
Then we get home seen we had mail to find out living in this apartment for a month for gas and lights cost us 200 bucks a month. thats right 200 bucks a fucking month. excuse my language but i can't even afford our rent. nothing is doing good. We just want a family, we want to live. We want everything to be okay.
Also, Soldier has a tumor. It was taken out. He is in alot of pain and had his manhood go bye bye. So when I need my dog "the rock" the most, the one you can look to and see something happy careless not worrying about anything but coming up to your face and give you kisses. I miss him so dam much. He is in pain they have pain pills for him to get better. Ice has to be put on his nut area every so often and less movement the better.I haven't even had time to really get over the fact he is gone, because I get emotional mixed up into something else bc things happen that fast in our world.
Now tell me what type of god does this? To make multi people suffer? Loosing faith but yet going to church sunday because the fact I need some. that I need some type of prayer to help. I cant even afford a phone that Army is demanding as much as his work.This is hell. We can't even live, its disgusting.
So there is, my life. Stressing. Scared. Hurt. Sad.Angry. Still have to wake up tomorrow and do it again. I'm so stressed I have a stress headache and a migrane and excedrin migrane medicine thats stronger than there regular stuff hasnt helped me in the least. I'm trying to control my self the best I can. So much has happen in the little bit of time, I cant stand it!
Take care, My happy place in my life is seeing Laura and Ryan I feel less stress and people who are happy and having my god child. That makes me happy. I only wish that I could be pregnant so I can give some one to look forward too in life to be good at. Shit I wish i was so Scott and I can look forward at something happy. But if we cant even live our life happy. We dragg everything down with us, its depressing. I cant stand it any more.

Knocked Down

2009-03-10T15:20:00.002-04:00

Wow talk about not suppose to stress, it officailly isnt happening any more. Nope thanks god for NOT HELPING!
Here I'll start our day, we got low on my money(like none) I borrowed money from my mom for gas,which 5 bucks moved us up alot. More than a quarter. We were running around Ryan and Laura for there things. Then we finished up go home relax and get things we needed to get along. Then once we walked in the door finally, Scott got on the computer and checked myspace. Myspace we had messages and comments. Then he seen some messages and starting reading, first off the message said I'm sorry Scott to tell you this, then it went on. That Adam (our best man for our wedding that had nothing to say) his mom died. Scott didnt even finishing reading the message and threw the laptop. He has been using crutches everywhere and he took off without them down the stairs and I'm shouting I'm coming. I was next to him when he was reading them I read a bit farther than him. We head to adams in condolences. Now if you know Scott you knew his family back then. Scott spent alot of his time 5 days a week at adams place eating there and everything. Scott had mutlipe moms in his life, the main ones are Adams mom, Justins Mom and his mom. So from there thank god we had gas money, we went to the eagles met the rest of his family. Which everyone was drinking, then we went to this house I think maybe his grandmas and met litterly there whole family. Down to his nephews Scott knew greater part of the family compared to me I had to be introduced. We spent the night there till about 1 am, then went to adams till about 330 am which scott(I counted) had about 15 beers and was trashed but not completely.
Then Scott had to go to work today at 330 pm. So he can ask to get out early thursday because the funeral and he went to go check for his apron and stuff in the car. He found a knife and cut himself while looking one of his fingers like real bad as a butcher cut he use to get. So we had to bandage that up, it needs stiches but so did his butcher ones he had done..
Alot was shared last night. It's stressfull, I'm so overwhelmed. So is Scott, we woke up today sat together a bit. I go "you happy today?" he says "yeah" i said "do you mean as happy as you can be because of our sitaution?" and he goes "thats how i exactly feel", I said "mee too." Today yesterday so depressing. So dragging. But had many good laughs, many good shared experinces.
Yet again I didnt get to unpack, I also been still freakin busy. All I want to do is lay down and sleep. I'm so unbelieveable tired. The army and state of michigan contacted him for some odd reason we called back but no one picked up. We just got a thing in the mail for to update tags on our car, which seems nearly impossible that we cant even make bills. we been driving around with no insurance cards because USAA said they would send us them and they havent at all. Well they send us booklets on what else they have to offer.
I got a warning like from Consumers energy telling me my bill is 400 bucks at lansing. We also have Scotts credit things coming up on there 7 years and they warned us to pay bc the years are up before they decide to take us to court.
Scott and I are thinking about going to baker. His is well paid off and mine isnt. but we would like to go and get it DONE! Get a life better than whatever the fuck were living in.
Im really been doubting my beliefs lately on god or what there is. Because why would god make me suffer? Why would god hurt people? Why would god put us in a position that constantly lets us down? What have we done to deserve this? Does my husband need to go land a few more rocks to make the big up there feel better? Does trying constantly to have a kid mean anything to him up there? Giving my dog up? i mean I'm more than sick of this. Barely making it with everything, then having multiple somethings go wrong to add on. Hitting us so hard there is no way to let a pain go because crying gets you no where and it doesnt relieve anything any more.
Just the point of giving up, because the guy up there will make sure no matter how hard i try will put me back into this position that iam in now, what man would do that?
So Im thinking of some short term college careers that I can get into, No matter what were already in debt but I dont need like 500,000 career debt to my name that i never finish. Just make it small but enough to make a living for the rest of my dam life. I have to watch what I get into because the economy is now looking at what they need these days than luxury and If I pick a luxury job then It would be pointless. Later it may pick up but shit we dont know that, were all suppose to die in 2012 anyways, Which by the way I'm really freaked out about that. Becauase thats when the planets all met and the earth is going to move and go close to the moon or closer to the sun. Neither of them is good! I dont even think they know how much were suppose to move. It's suppose to happen december 19th 2012. That isnt far! Well I'm going to go and sleep or try to find some clothes for thursday. thursday is the funeral Scott has to ask to get out of work early and MAN I hope he does
Take Care Everyone

The Chances are

2009-03-08T14:49:00.002-04:00

Slim unless it Scott Johnson, then the chances run pretty high. Like getting into a blackhawk helicopter and fly up at the 15.5 feet in the air limit and land on a rock bigger than his fist. Thats right a rock. If the rock wasnt there he would of been fine, the person yelled at him to get up and he couldn't. He was carried to the medical place. His foot looks dirty like charcoal but its an acutal bruise on impact. He messed up his alcheles tended a little bit but he will be fine in a week the doctor told him. I think more than a week for sure and so does Scott. But there is an acutal guy and his job is to make sure this doesn't happen by picking up this stuff. Everyone was looking around for more rocks and what not and thats the only one they found. My hunny happened to land on it.
So I'm suppose to be stress free. Does any one see that happening?lol
Then they are going to get him some new glasses which is awesome because he needs it. He also got promoted this month to PFC = Private First Class. And they are paying him for three days instead of two. Even though he was only there for two. So we got the uper hand at that. It was acutally his SGT fault but whatever. His SGT said to him you just didnt want to do your pt test huh? So went and landed on a rock lol I think Scott goes up like 50 bucks, i could be wrong though. But that is alittle update on our life
Take Care Everyone

Stress Free

2009-03-07T15:41:00.003-05:00

So, I'm trying to stay stress free. That's right no stress. I can't not tell you how unbelievable hard it is. I stress alot. I just keep taking deep breaths and relax and stop thinking. Or something is bothering me i blurt it out now. haha I did that in the car it shocked Scott. I apologised later but he understood because im trying. I have been so busy and racked up in some pretty stupid shit lately. I think I deserve it.

Today and Tomorrow was my plan to unpack thats right I haven't unpacked i have been that busy. So today I have unpacked nothing haha. I have to clean before I unpack but I'm getting there. I just got done doing dishes there drying right now. Then I will have to unpack the rest of the dishes and wash them because they been in the plastic bin to long and I dont want my plates or anything smell or be plasticy. Then our clothes are packed. Yeah there packed. Along with all my cleaners. House decorations.

But today I'm pulling out my beef jerky and unthawing it so I can cure it and then I can make beef jerky. Thats right jerky!! lol It sounds pretty good right now. Scott and I hope this year we can do something for our anniversary since it is a 5 week month and we will have an extra pay check. I mean it not much. He makes 80-90 a week. Yeah sadly we have a gas for the apartment eletric water rent car insurance food and gas for the car. That come out of that paycheck. Thats not much. If any one knows any math,80 a week is 320. And 90 is 360 and Our rent let alone is 325 =[
But I'm going to stop making everyone worry about my problems, because we have more than just bills. Argh I stressed again. Were so poor I can walk into FIA and they can file my foodstamps twice as fast as a regular person walking in there because it would be an emergency file. Also I can walk out with cash assistance until I get food stamps. But I dont like taking from the state and I'm not going to, I'm going to wait it out and then get some food stamps. I have to have a month of pay stubs anyways.We have food at the moment. So whatever, I'm letting it go. Deep Breath. And exhale. Who cares?

So yeah my husband and I got on the laptop and signed on the AKO site which is an Army site and Scott never really told me how IMPORTANT the site is to him. He been blantly ignoring it. OMG I could of yelled at him! So on with the story we sign in then I see an email from Adair which is the head guy at the base in Grand Ledge saying Attention for this weekend with the Army.So we were like oh crap! So I opened it and says that this guy slipped his mind and forgot to tell everyone, which would be Scott that they need to be there Friday at 4 pm at the base not Saturday in the morning. Thats right 4 PM! We are just reading this at midnight Friday!!! I'm like Scott go to sleep and then had the nerve to say to me 4 hours of sleep when the alarm was going off because he has to be there at like 6 he questioned me can i stay home? I was like no Scott we need the money now get ready. Hes like okay and then drags his way in the shower to wake him up. I dont think he even left till 6 and he would of made it there about 7.It's a 40 minute drive from our home. Atleast that is what the Garmin says. Our garmin is so cool! I love it!! lol I Favorite everyones place even if they are two blocks away. I just like using it.

Scotts grandma isnt doing too good from what I hear. She just went into the hospital for a heart thing. I think some one needs to tell her its okay to go then fight to see if it is. My opinion thats what I think she is doing. No one wants her to go because they look at her as like young hop hop grandma and when these things come around Scott is never good at handling it. Either is his family but I can only change one person at a time. Hopefully, our kids wont act like he does.

We are still trying to start a family. I posted a thing on myspace so everyone knows now becauase I think just immediate family knew we were trying. Since Scott and I were going to be god parents we were discussing who would take over our kids in the future. Because we would like it to be one of our friends, then we discussed it. We came up with one finally.In Owosso our friends have no kids what so ever. Well not anymore, Ryan and Laura is to be parents. We only know one other people that has talked about kids and seriously checked baby stuff out and what not. So I can't say now who it would be but I think they would be great. They arent engagned or married but they should be! They were in our wedding. That's all im giving. Well we both liked justin and mention it to him the very first time we were trying and he laughed at us and said no. Which sounds like justin. But he doesnt want the honor and he needs more than just him because we plan on having a nice size family. Also whats the chances of both of us dieing right? Exactly,but it can happen. Also there has been a thing floating around between Scott and I of changing baby names because the ones we picked out I'm not liking them as much any more and he still does.So there is still a discussion there to be made about that. That probably wont come up until there is an acutally baby inside of me haha. Yeah but we like to plan ahead. So when things come around it will just be easier.

Other than that I really do think my dishes are dried now. I'm still typing away. Also my animals are hungry. We ran out of dry food which made Jasmin happy and Scooter pissed. Scooter loves dry so much. well I put a thing of can food on a plate on the floor and i put the whole thing because more than one cat is eating. I look over two hours later and freakin jasmin is still eating it and scooter got some here or there. He didnt really bother. He ate to settle his stomach from hunger but he didnt fill eat. He will sooner or later, but Jasmin decided to eat a whole can to her self! Miss piggy! Then she came to me purring up a storm and laid down on me cleaning me and about to fall asleep.The way she ate that food, makes me wonder how much dry food she eats.

Well Take Care Everyone

It may be raining outside but things will starting shining =]

Soldier

2009-03-06T21:05:00.002-05:00

Is now gone. He took off with a family we were more than confortable with.
They have had pitbulls before and soldier really listened to the guy. Its a woman and her three kids. One is a teenager and helps his mother. But to that, we do get updates pictures and such.
But its alittle hard at home. Scott is gone this weekend and Im going to try to take the advantage of it like always.
Take Care Everyone

To Scott

2009-03-06T20:53:00.002-05:00

I'm sorry this has happened and we had to do this, but things will get better. They always do. I apologize again and I know you hate me apologizing I know its not my fault but I love you. That is all that matters. Things are better and will get better and things will be great.

Grow Up

2009-03-06T10:04:00.003-05:00

I'm sick and tired of this. When some one ask a favor and you say yes, guess what? YOU DO IT! THAT'S THE PART OF SAYING YES!!!!!!!Not a week later change your mind becuase you dont feel like it. He is your son and he asked you a favor and that can't even fullfill. I know your old but you dam right should of said no than play with our emotions. Thats right say NO! I'm only with experinces with his family. I know to learn and not to ever try again. It's pointless and worthless. Yet I can't be dogging them because there family. It's just im really hurt and not like she gives a shit.I could out rage.
She wrote us while having him, two days after we first dropped him off. So when are you coming to take him out and give him a walk. You need to come over and see him. Then a day later, My dog went missing. He was outside and was gone..It's called a leash. Thats even if he did run away. Because he cant break there chain in the back I do know that! And if he was free why would he just be sitting on the neighbors porch...And you looked EVERYWHERE! Right Fucking bullshit.Then we get another right back you need to come get him we are having a meeting about grandma she isnt doing good the metting is at 9 9:30 pm. First of all this is a touchy subject but I'm going to straighten something right now, Uncle harry has been visiting her alot, compared to his mom. So when we get told this one thing and then head to little ceasers, obviously for pizza. We have uncle harrys wife saying that she is fine, she keeps having a pain but they keep checking up on her. Did you not understand the FINE part of it. Then I started looking when she wrote its thursday, thursday is wrestling night where tons of people come over drink and party it up. Then we message her back and she says well I dont want him mauling people. Then she wrote to us again saying soldier been in his crate alot and dad cant stand him. that we need to come get him. Then she leaves messages on my space in her mood saying ridiculous things.like the some one better get this dog before the old man kills him.
It's sad when her own son is more mature put together well done for himself than she is and ever will be!
This a dam right mean blog but this is my puppy my baby my dog. A simple no I dont want to would of avoided this whole situation. then I realized they dont even know how to say no. I'm never going to ever bug of her anything again. EVER!
Scott wants another animal, I dont even want to see one. I went to grandpas and seen cain and cried. Because I seen a dog.
I also something to look foward to now. I'am going to be a god parent to Laura and Ryan baby. She is pregnant and they been trying as long as us. Gives me hope that we will. She gave some input what she was doing. So now I'm suppose to be a non stressfull person now. Yeah thats right lets not stress! Stress is part of my life. Laura and I have been pretty much synced. We got married around the same time, Well on my planned day that had to get moved but wasnt far from hers Same wedding dress and we didnt even know each other at this time. Then she got a haircut and I go over there with a haircut not knowing lol Then later on we did it again. Then we both dyed our hair haha didnt even know it. Its right one after another things its so dead on. She is pregnant so I hope not so far along I will be too. But I dont know who our god parents are going to be, we never discussed that. I hope I dont fail in anyway of being a god parent. I was one at a point and time. It would be cool to have a pregnant buddy, the guys might hate it later on haha But I hope I can let go of everything and let scott take over and have my stress. If it doesnt get me pregnant i atleast know my husband will do it for me. Suppose to look at the bright side.
Well with my very mixxed emotions today, I'm going to check on my roast that i started a long time ago. It smells good. Maybe gather my self so I can not cry while giving my dog away because kids will be there also with him.
Take Care Everyone

Prepare for the worse

2009-03-04T17:08:00.002-05:00

Well I had the nicest guy ever in the world that will foster my dog and pay for everything and Im going to turn it down. For soldiers sake.Sounds retarded dont it?
This is what this guy does, he has a little buisness to foster animals that are loosing there family from anything. Yet giving the animal hope and get to see and keep in touch with there family. Well, he would even pay for food. He lives in Howel I have his address and all to check the place out and what not.So why I'am not keeping him? Because there is many reasons. He is my dog and I love him to death. But what happens if he gets sick of the dog like Scott moms, we will back through this again. He is looking for a dog to keep for his permenant family, thats why he wrote me. Soldier have moved a bit so far in his 8 month life and I dont want it to happen again or put him through this again. I dont have enough in me to feel the pain. Also with him fostering were suppose to visit and I dont think we can. Our lease is a year and living with some one else he is going to take the asuming that is his new owner with us barely around. Which BLOWS. The guy is a trainer he knows what he is doing. Soldier needs that. This guy wants a dog that will stick around help him out and love him and everything. that is my dog. This guy deserves to have a dog and enjoy his own than everyone elses and if I had to choose out of all the dogs I know in my life I would choose Soldier. Scott doesnt understand he thinks we can afford it. But truthfully we dont even know if we can. So far hes gott paid 84 bucks a week. yeah..So no, not yet.
So i got hope that we would be able to do this to let my self down and knowing its better off for us not to have him. Everyone knows this. So there ya go, Soldier will be gone soon and I still have to tell the guy and make Scott understand.
Since this whole new thing now with cards and getting paid. He doesnt get stubs..Some one told him he has to print them out at work. So we will see about that more tomorrow because I cant file with FIA unless I proof of him working and I dont think his word and a card is going to proove anything to them.
But other than that, I will get off. Update you all. I'm dealing with a sick very moddy grumpy asshole of a husband. Who is driving me insane and snapping at me every time he gets around me. GRRR I hate stress I hate owosso I hate everything about this. But there is nothing I can do.

undescribeable

2009-03-04T09:47:00.002-05:00

No one has wrote back on the dog.
He went missing in Owosso the other day. And was found.
I'm so upset about this whole thing I havent even broke down. Yeah not one tear left my face. I have not seen him since I was told we had to get rid of him. I just want to see him when I give him away.
I got to check with Scott but I'm posting soldier up for free. No one is taking him and he needs to go now. Hes just putting stress into our lives.
I guess when we go full time now we dont have to worry about other state laws about pitbulls and trying to find places because we have him. Im not paying his mom for the louzy 2 weeks she has him. It's ridiculous.
im at hopes my brother gets some one to move into the house, i know hes been trying. We were going to back and clean the place but just havent had time to do so.
Still most of our dishes are packed and so our clothes. Along as many other things. We need a bar that does into our closet unless to hang some stuff up. I have to start hand washing anyways. Also Scott was up alot last night puking bc somehting he ate or not feeling good I dont know yet.
But I have to go and clean and make the place look nice bc we are picking up some of our friends to see our new place. This time its going to look nice! lol
Well I got to go,
Take Care

Go Figure

2009-03-03T11:37:00.003-05:00

We have to get rid of Soldier and like we told a few people and no one seems to understand.
I'm upset but I cant show it. I'm pissed cant show that either. I also am holding my feelings back bc there is no point any more for something like this to effect me. I just give up.
We have only had one write back on the dog. Scott already doesn't like him. We havent even decided as a married couple how we are going to do things. So that explains how well things are going back at home...BLAH
Nothing is working with me, im still not done unpacking. Oh friends came over to a messy apartment twice!Because were unpacking.
We missed trash again here. Go figure.
I'm stressed hurt and pissed.
I hate this
I'm done, it only took a matter of time to something else went wrong our way.
You know Soldier was there for me, when scott was gone. He kept me going always happy. Wanted to do things wanted to go outside. Looked up to me, enjoyed going places. Got me out. Made days go so much more faster. He made my days better happier. Its weird i know im just stupid and had feelings and will miss him.
But forget it, I'm never getting a dog again and I cant wait till he is gone
Take Care Everyone

Relax

2009-03-01T09:52:00.002-05:00

It's really nice to sit here and relax.
Even though I have tons of stuff to do around the apartment. The apartment looks amazing! lol Were still packed though.
I'm in a better mood today, Not ever so depressed. Which feels better. I hope nothing ruins my mood!
Other than that, I'm sitting home relaxing. I hurt my floating rib the other day. It was so painful!It's the only rib that is connected to your back. Oh my god i could barely breath barely sit barely unpack. i had to take many breaks. I searched it up online best ways to help it heal, because usually when people injure is by coughing wrong or sneezing and such. Well it was to lay down on the floor and but your hands underneath your head and breathe. It hurt! But i slept alot and strechted and it went away. Just I never ever want to do that again. Sometimes it knocks people out 6-8 weeks. Which i understand why but that would blow.
I have my hopes today for some beer and pizza. We so deserve it.
Scott made a blog on here last night I thought it was very sweet. Now we can blog together or what not. It should be interesting.
Last night Scott and I were fooling around with the webcam on the laptop and some how it turned to me catching him making faces haha Well i did and some out rageously funny. We posted the best on myspace. Then one of us together, we havent had a recently posted on there of us in awhile.
But other than that, I'm going to go make me some breakfast...Bluemuffin cereal mmm. I will probably get my hamster (superman) out and share with him lol He likes it alot. He will store like 6 cereal pieces in his mouth and hold on to one bc it doesnt fit. I love hamsters. He has never bit us and is ever so nice. It's weird but he is the best hamster we have ever had.he loves sitting on you getting pet too.
Take Care Everyone

Were moved

2009-02-28T17:00:00.004-05:00

That's right we live in Owosso now.
We live in an apartment that doesnt allow our dog.So we have some one else watching him for the meantime. That let alone is hard, watching some one take care of my animal. But I have to deal with it.
Also Scott is working still part time. We will be cutting it on bills like before. So nothing has changed just an overcroweded place and with neighbors right under me.
We couldn't even take all of our stuff with us. We made 4 loads with our car and 2 loads with my parents. Very glad my family was able to help out and my brothers friend. Or we would of just took some clothes and moved bc couldn't totally afford to do it ourself.
I'm pretty much depressed lately, something I have to deal with obviously.
Just watching some friends of ours, move to Virginia. Get a promotion, which could and still be Scotts and then be so freaking happy everything is going great and then they get pregnant with there second child. It must be nice. Plans follow through for everyone else. Could of been Scott and yet still could be! But no we have a year contract, so no promotion no moving no out of state no being happy. Because we ever so planned this to happen.
Make things better, I think if Scott just went to war. Obviously Scott and I do better when he is away. But when he is home we live horrible. But I couldn't live with my self if we made that decision to sign up and go. I know he would get a bonus and move up faster on the promotion not like he would if he was in virginia. You only really get so many raises in the Army and if you move up like 3 spots and doesnt count against you that right there is amazing. Just life on what were missing out.
We for sure have been the talk of Owosso, We well didnt really tell any one that were moving back so when we move back and go to visit. They said oh i heard you were back in town and working at Meijers. Wow, already started. Yippee!
I keep telling myself this is where I grew up this is where scott and I met this is suppose to be a good place. But truly its not good unless your visiting. But were nothing but visitors.
I have accomplished two birthdays today and picking Scott up from work and made it on time for all!
We have a leak at our apartment already, dealing with the lanlord isnt that great but whatever. Leaks and bad things tend to follow us.
We saved on car insurance. We are now down to, 48 a month than 92 a month. Totally nice.We also still have to change our addresses and Also postal wize too. We also had to cancel scotts MRI that he gets paid for. Because he worked.He also missed nates birthday. He seems to be there more to visit than for birthdays. Which its understandable,he just started at this job. Litterly made friends with everyone.
We have our friends that live so close to us, We been creeping them out lately haha Been telling them that we see them and we live near. They will look sometimes while outside and then message us on myspace LOL We also are suppose to shout there name at 950 pm and so he can see where we are.
But for now I have to go in my spare room and hand wash my clothes in our tub. And hang them Oh and pick up the house. Then repack my clothes when there dry. Same with dishes i can only wash a load one bc thats how long the water last and to there is no room to put clean dishes so one sink is the rinse and dry and the other is wash. Sigh, i hate this. I dont want to be here but I will put a smile on my face and move on. What a thrill..
Take Care Everyone

Ps
I'm happy to have my husband around. That is all that matters to me.

2009-02-28T11:18:00.000-05:00

Bummer

2009-02-18T12:10:00.001-05:00

Well,here it is. We need credit to get some where nice.
We looked at a few apartments today. Infact everyone that called us back we made an appointment.
First place, Looked real nice but Not dog friendly. Cats only. No cat deposit the rent is 350. But pratically all bills are shared really. the guy has it set up very weird and he works alot. He said hes never really in town because he was really really nice.
Second place were dog frienly in One of the three apartments this lady had.Yeah that's right she acutally had for but one was an effecienty and no room. So we took a look at the three. They ranged from 2 one bedrooms and 1 two bedroom.
-First place, it was by shell west town. 1 bedroom and it looked real nice but like the flooring was really bad. Slanted badly in some spots its noticeable to just look. Then we found like an area missing boards in the floor. Which didnt make any sense but this place had a bit of room
-Second place was nice and Dog friendly. It had alot of bad things. Like a stove without a handle and things left over.No cabinets. A bathroom that had two door ways and one door.
-Third was just as bad but cabinets I couldnt even see in or barely open smaller one bedroom. It's not something I want to live in at all
So Went to Durand check places out there and they were so much better, Like it lightened our day but once we hear we will need a co signer ir ruined it. Because that is the hardest thing to do is that. To get one. Because we dont know how much hours they are really going to work Scott and we truly dont know if we even be able to afford the place.
I'm alittle freaking out because we need to move ASAP! We dont want to drag anyone down under with us. Becauase we do that. We aren't that good of tenants in my opinion and I'm just about done looking and take a slum lord. Just so we can have something because isnt that what truly matters? Well It would be nice to have a nice place. We will find one but in time is the question.
Well I'm going to get off and well go to bed. I went to bed at 4 am with Scott and we woke up at 8am and got around he worked and we did apartment looking.Man this blows big time! But we did it to our selves. Things that seem better or good for us we go for and it ruins us. Some how some way.We should of almost stayed at bannans and stayed at the apartment for more years to come.
Take Care Everyone

Monday

2009-02-15T22:34:00.003-05:00

Well tomorrow is monday and Scott has an interview. We called a trailer place and check up on one and well it was pretty good something scott and I can live in. Needs some fixing up. But that is okay! He pratically has a job at Meijers he has to work there so long before coming full time and its a full time position open. They had one interview on the phone and monday is his next in person. Then we are going to go to the trailer place and check up on our application. Because we haven't heard anything and if we dont get it we are going to fill out another one. We think maybe why we havent heard back is because Scott has a far away jobs and where we live at and such. The high guy has the word if we move in and not the lady. I wish the lady we would be moved in already. But soldier did pass very well on his inspection.
Today Scott and I both cleaned yeah thats right Scott cleaned with me. Oh and my valentines present was an used Laptop Its old but new. Its recent enough to have vista which is nice!! We havent got our taxes back yet but we will. I hate waiting! I'm on it right now and Scott loves his ipod. He listened sing and stuff while cleaning today. Its pretty scheeet. God Scott is spoiled. I just got lucky thats all with a guy that needed a card. We been downloading alot of songs and what not. O hand justin redid our laptop so I dont have alot of peoples stuff on it. Because I guess there was a shit ton. But its really nice and something I could make profit off of easily but I'm not because I LOVE IT! I haven't even downloaded a single thing yet which is pretty weird. It also has a built in wireless card, I think they make those no matter what in pcs but for this one it was specailly put in we think its old but were not sure. I havent searched it up yet Been busy.
But I thought I would update everyone, we are still in a hole in things but we are looking at the bright side and not letting anything get to us.
Take Care Everyone

I can't make hearts on this laptop =[ =[ =[ =[
well darn it!

Bright as the sun shines

2009-02-08T11:32:00.002-05:00

So I just realized that our anniversary is coming for our two years being married. I know its nothing compared to people that are like 30 some odd year anniversary but were going to be stuck at home =[ that happen last year too. I sort of dont want that at all. I was hoping that I will be able to save some from our taxes just enough for like a hotel one night in oscoda. Make a morning trip and spend the day there and wake up spend the day and come home. But our luck, we wont be able too. It won't come through and never will happen.We never done anything for most of our anniversaries. I mean we do things at home, but thats it.
One time Scott for our anniversary he made a candle light dinner at home, he was dressed up in a tux and everything. He was our host and my date haha. But it went all granted.
Last year for our wedding anniversary, we sat home because we had no money and we spent time together. I mean he was getting ready to leave anyways so, we didn't really have a choice.
Usually when we do have money for an anniversary we go to like Applebee's and then a movie. We usually go out at like 1 and be back at 5 to sit at home. We also hate applebees in Owosso because some odd reason it doesnt taste the same in lansing and the one in owosso has horrible service too.
But I only hope that we could do something for our anniversary, or maybe go to the casino. Were really not gamblers though we dont even buy lottery tickets and we will get upset bc it smells like smoke and we would leave. So I dont know but I'm trying to think of a cheap way to do something this year.
Other than that, i'm home selling my dog crate hopefully today. The small one not the big one. Also pack and do dishes and cook supper.
So take Care everyone
♥

Rawr

2009-02-07T07:35:00.007-05:00

Well, were on the move. My greatest fear is not having a place to live. My biggest thing is not living with my dog. Another thing is trying to make bills living at either places with both of us don't have a job.
Little Ceasers is hiring in the town we are moving in. Also the pizza places around the rest of the town don't do online applications so we need to go into town so he can hit the rest of the pizza delivery jobs. But Little Ceasers hiring lady has the flu and wont hopefully be back by Monday. We know like 5 people there and in hopes because of that, we will get Scott in there. Just some things really suck because I guess your suppose to be happy when you move, but this isn't a happy move. Owosso has put a lot of stress and other things on our relationship before.I know people seen it and seen a change when we were out. We could be hermits in our house and yet still have people and things get between us. I hate it, we moved away from there and life has been so much better in every way. I know probably as other people will see living in Owosso will take a toll on Scott and I, and you might see it again. So I don't think no matter what type of place we get, we will be stuck in a very dramatic town that isn't meant for us. Frankly my not so happy ass should be on a warm beach in Virginia, but we have an ignorant SGT that does his paperwork and his recruiters are first before us,which is understandable but he doesn't bother to make time for us. Maybe in his mind but that's the only effort he has showed us.
I also have a gut feeling that I should of picked the first apartment and just be moved in already because our chances of finding a place is already slim to none with our animals. That im even trying to live some where with them, is not a move I would make and its way out of my comfort zone especially when we need a place. I'm one of those people that just need to get it done, no matter if my feelings get hurt its done and out of the way. The place was cheap we could of up fronted rent a few months and thats pretty good considering our situation.
But we are looking Tuesday at a trailer in a trailer park. The trailer price is 500 and thats to own. the lady on the phone said one of the bathrooms need flooring which isn't bad at all. But its a 2 bedroom 1 and half bathroom. So That sort of excites me. I would be happy to live at a place I own and the lot rent is cheap than make other people in debt.But if this trailer is no good, then I couldn't began to tell you how disappointed i will be. Also we have to bring our dog in to meet the trailer park lady for her approval of soldier. So we went off and bought this herbal dog medicated tea they have at petco and give it to soldier and its called CALM DOWN! It's suppose to do what its called. So, lets cross our fingers on that one. We gave him some already and it does calm his nerves down to an extent. which I love. We can also use it on our cats too and it will keep them calm so I was thinking of giving them some when we move so everyone will be fine in the car.
Oh and Valentines day is coming up. One thing Scott and I will go to greatest links is doing things for each other on certain holidays or celebrations. I know Scott found something really good at a clean out one day with his old job. Wouldn't tell me what it is and that i know a few people were angry BUT It's my Valentines present I can't wait. Been waiting for February. Other than I LOVE Valentines day. This month makes me ever so happy, that it gives me goose bumps. =] I have successfully sold some thing around the house and got an used Ipod for Scott. He doesn't know it yet and I gave the guy my boost sim card. Because we don't have a phone for it so why not.But Scott isn't going to be on the computer for awhile so I know he wont read this post so I'm saying something. I got a fairly good deal. This guy before hand bought my old DS Lite and loved it. he was talking about really badly needing a sim card but really wouldn't say why and I asked what he had as a trade and he pulled a few devices out of his pockets and one was a Ipod. Not just that its an Ipod scott would love. It's worth $ and I got a sim card out of an Ipod. Man oh man I have been wanting to get on it and work it but I can't Scott's ALWAYS home!!So when you read this Scott,HAPPY VALENTINES DAY!!!Sorry its used and not new BUT you got one! Well the time you read it it may be past valentines day but I hope you like it.
But I got to go and clean and pack and trash. That's so not exciting in the least bit but I cant seem to get anything done when Scott is home and this weekend is his one weekend a month. So I have to most definitely take an advantage of it that he is gone. He is also gone getting information on getting a different SGT and also about moving. He sort of didn't want to go this weekend well he has no choice but you know you got too.But I need to stop blabbering so,
Take Care Everyone
♥

Oh it might not be awhile until my next post.
Also this is my 100th post and thank you for sticking around since July. I appreciate it.

update

2009-02-01T11:21:00.003-05:00

Well scotts work is being a pain. we are still very much behind. He worked two days this last week. We very much grumpy and hungry. We have food, no meat but green beans noodles jello peas carrots applesauce.Not technically meals but we been mixing veggies with noodles. I went hungry bc im sick of eating it.
We contacted some friends that are sewing Demmer and we heard that they are doing a rehiring thing. But we have to go with a different employment agency. We have to wait till Monday for that.
Recruit is still avoiding us. i cant wait till Scott's one weekend a month so he can get some one for us. Hopefully, we will get to go full time. They do have a choice of keeping him in Michigan or what not. Our old SGT would of got us out of that if it came up bc hes that good. He also would of got us to where we wanted to go. But well I can't tell you what this new recruiter going to do or expect of the guy.
Soldier been really bad lately and we almost got rid of him. He attacked me one night bc im guessing he isn't liking the way i have been punishing him. now we just yell at him and dont point or anything. So thats first time he showed his teeth and then bit my hand. I laid him to the ground so he would not outrage on anything else. Scott came to my rescue and we got him upstairs. He bit scott twice on the way up. Since it was late we called his mom to ask about dog bites, not to give her the dam story. Well they thought we were going to "destroy" our dog. so when we were trying to figure what were going to do, they called alot and kept interrupting us. Because its our decision. Then his sister Sara went very immature as she is and claims. which i have lost pretty much all respect for her. She told me to die in a black hole and almost called me a bitch. That was not going to fly with me. I told her off. she told me my opinion doesn't matter and that i dont matter to her just Scott. so I said sorry hunny but boy oh boy your brother loves me more than you. Get over it, hes married to me. hes not going to do something you dont want him to do bc its you sara. isn't that why you cried on our wedding because you lost your big bro? Yeah, I went to far in a way but she deserved it. She going to be grown up soon. More in life than what I handed to her. We don't plan on going over there because of how his family reacted at least for a little while.His mom also started drinking and called again and told Scott that the dog is more important to her than him...yeah. his mom apologized and his sister never will and i wont accept it.
Then grandma been sick in the hospital. But shes doing better from what we heard =]
So heres the shitty update of whats been going on.
Oh and i thought i was working at papa johns. BLAH! Okay you go to papa johns tell them you want to pass out flyers they told me to come this day, they assigned people to go to a different papa johns to grab the flyers and do the area around there. Well a group of people were sent to a closed papa johns[me and others]. we all went back and to tell them and he said sorry no opening we thought they were open.
Hmm what else, we are selling alot of stuff online no one is buying. We have went as low as 50 bucks on our DS Lite for food and no one took it. So i took it off.
But today we are going into town and eating at grandpas YEY!
Also, I have picked up an FIA Form for food stamps but I cant seem to find all of scotts stubs.. Last week when scott worked alot, he went in to pick up his check and his boss said, what for? like Scott done nothing. They have laid 4 people off. We did a thing online an estimate on how much we would get for food stamps and it was about 300 some. That would be nice! but i dont believe it we never had that much. i expect much less.
Well, I'm going to get off and get in the shower get ready to head into town.
Take Care Everyone
♥

Yeah So, here it is.

2009-01-21T01:39:00.002-05:00

We called his SGT to make an appointment right? yeah well it was at 1 pm on tuesday. So we waited and it was one then one thirty then were like this isnt right? call him up and forgot about our date setup and made plans. So Scott could of worked today but didnt because of his SGT! Then at 4 we had the lady we needed to reschedule with, to take our blood for tuesday also. She acutally showed up in a decent time but not a decent time to cash the check for taking our blood. But we did get 25 bucks and its all going into our gas tank bc its low.
So his SGT felt bad, made an ill call tomorrow if your home around the time you said you would be we will come over and do what we need to do. Well, lets only hope today bring in some good news and not bad. So we only hope scotts work will have him off by 6ish so he can come over and if not ill be angry. Today is also girls day I haven't talked to ashley in forever and it would be nice to hang with her and get away from scott no offence scott.
We had to run somewhere tuesday thinking we could trust soldier alone tops like 15 minutes in the house free to do whatever whenever, now you think as a dog that he would do something really really bad or do really good. I was seeing if we can trust him. I found out that we cant because he pooped on our floor like 4 times and we took him out before we left and he pooped we were litterly gone barely 10 minutes tops! i think he got scared and pooped him self every where.
So later on today if things work out I will give an update.
Other than that we are still having some pretty hard trouble on bills and saving. Nothing worked the way that we planned but that is usually how that works out. Everything goes smooth and you start to plan things because you think you can now because your doing good, well you can't.
We been testing out WoW or I should say World of Warcraft game. It's like giving your life away addicting. We can't afford to pay for it but we keep getting trails. Its 40 some bucks every three months. But the first two months you have to pay 20 bucks. then change your payment plan. Which is GAY!
Oh soldier demolished our very expensive microphone headset we have it was worth 60 bucks down the drain.
The cats have been doing pretty good they been REALLY noisey when people come over and try to get there attention constantly or try to lay on t he persons stuff. its highly annoying.
Well i complained alot...lol Didnt mean too but things havent been going our way. i have been home ALOT and im sick of it! But things haven been going pretty well other than that, Scott and I have been getting along we bicker just alittle bit not even a tad but thats a relationship. jobs havent been looking up for us either. So that is that.
Well take everyone
♥

ouchy

2009-01-14T08:33:00.003-05:00

I hurt today, yesterday I was cleaning and i knelled down to fix something and i knelled down on the monitor cord and the monitor fell on me and roll down my back and i hit the floor. it hurt so bad! I was rearranging the house and I REALLY like it! But today i woke up and my shoulder hurts with my neck and my arm is half way bruised but im doing good! lol just in pain, scott keeps hitting my arm and i warned him that if he accident hits my arm one more time he has it coming for him :] I wouldn't really do anything but he thinks so ;] or lets hope!
Today I have MSU coming over to take scott and I blood at our house. They are taking 3 vials each from each other. they are doing a research to see in how we attract to each other..its weird i know but we get paid so I dont care
I woke up today at 5am for a guy to buy a tv from us. He works 3rd shift and he said he will call before he comes but I wanted to get downstairs start coffee get the dog out turn the lights on get the tv in the living room at least and wake up scott to sit with me. Well the guy doesn't call till 6 and comes and picks it up.
Then also scott's job is going to be opening a maid service within there business and they are hiring family first thank god and obviously its all females and my word is in saying I want to work with them but i don't know when its opening up or what not but it will be nice give us extra money and we both work at the same place.
Hmmm what else... We also got called on a MRI from MSU for scott for money they pay us to drive there for him to take an MRI and then come back. Which is SCHWEET! because he did it two years ago and they want to do it again to see how the brain how progressed and such. so thats nice!
So money is coming in, slowly and more effort than we thought but we are getting it, I can't truly tell you if we will be able to catch up. But we are trying hard.
Well im so freaking tired im going back to sleep!! zzzzz
Take Care Everyone and BUNDLE UP!!!
♥

p.s.
I found my license yey!!!

Tuesday

2009-01-13T09:03:00.003-05:00

At 1pm next week with SGT Brice Meerman YEYEYEYEYEYEYEY We have an appointment to get on track.
I have been some soul searching lately and I thank Scott for dealing with my emotional ass, but I realized that some things I couldn't leave behind when I move. I made amends with Stacey. I apologized and she did too. Were not friends and we will never be again but its good to know the last word i said to my last best friend was "I hope the best for you" compared to "you should of done something about it, its not our fault." So yeah that made me feel a bit better.
I think some where in the whole packing thing I somehow packed my license ha, go figure because I can't find it. Scott's been driving everywhere and its hella annoying. I'm more than capable of driving.
We have been so stressed lately. I got a answer back from Two Men and Truck for Scott but the applications they sent us I can't open because we don't have the same programs they use. So I got to make him walk in there get an application talk to the guy and hope that he can work. We need money bad! Starting the first I will owe 1050 on rent alone. A 200 gas bill, 80 car insurance 100 Comcast and 140 water and light. I can't push car insurance they don't allow that we need a car. We don't need Comcast but we need a phone for jobs. then i can pay 100 on consumers and 70 some on water and light. I got to pay them before the shut off notice which SUCKS! Consumers is being really pushy and I argued with one of the ladies because she was saying well you just put down like 700 bucks and you got gas for you to go into debt again she said i don't think your able to keep up with anything in my life. yeah that went well. I hate consumers. When we move its going in Scott's name so when we have a problem, I can use the excuse Scott it's in your name you have to call them!
But other than that, im keeping my self sane. I'm scared a bit to move. Farthest I have moved is where I'am now which tells me i can take an out of state move but I'm scared that something bad is going to happen while im gone and not be able to afford to come back and visit. Oh yeah and im freaking out a little bit that I wont be able to afford to move. So i don't know. I hope good things come out for Tuesday.
I hope everyone stays warm today too its suppose to get colder through out the day. Thursday of a high is -5 our tv said so, bundle up please!
Oh yeah Scott and I cooked last night together. His aunt Sylvia shaved thing slices of meat of venison for sandwiches all you have to do is cook it in a fryer. Well we did it was like roast beef but venison taste and different texture but it was with sautee onions with onion bread and to the side we had sweet potatoes that tasted like my moms at thanksgiving.
I'm getting off take a nap or read or crochet or play a game..or clean. how boring! lol
Take Care Everyone
♥

Oopsy

2009-01-12T00:03:00.002-05:00

I haven't been on in awhile and wrote. Truly don't know when I will be on next. Been a little busy bee I think. Just been keeping my self occupied thats for sure. Scott's been home a lot not getting so much work and we have been trying for new jobs and new places and such. That hasn't been going so well either which is really aggravating. We haven't even heard a single ring a ding back from McDonald's and we applied there. Scott's applications are way over qualified for anything. I mean when an application asked what he has done at his last few jobs usually some resumes or applications say like sweeper a cook things a little not so great or they are over the top because they went to college. But Scott's for not going to college he has been a butcher, he is truck driver with military history, he a sub contractor, Assistant Manager, I mean he has both front line and back line work done in restaurant for three years, he is a sales person he worked at game crazy and yet he has been a welder a grinder making hummer and axells, I mean he seems to have done it all and quite well. But no call backs or calls to say the least. So what are we suppose to do? go homeless? It blows. We even came up with a really bad idea but to sign up for Iraq. Get the bonus get us moved and straightened. Really its not a good idea and yet we don't even know if he would go right away. So its not even a quick fix. Its actually the dumbest idea we have ever had.
We haven't called the Sergeant yet either, meaning too. just haven't. which is really weird for people that want to move badly. we know much work wont get done and he cant actually sign till the 6 month line but it puts a lot of paper work done and so it can get in faster and to the spot we want.it will get also alot of things straightened. but i'm fully on to moving and I wish I could go now.
But other than that I have crocheted so bad that i have a muscle that has not stopped twitching in my hand giving my hand random pain whenever.
soldier has officially almost made two holes in our bed and we are looking for a new one. We are thinking of getting rid of our couch and getting another papasan chair and it just having chairs there more comfortable lol The one scott brought home is like two and half of the size of a papasan chair you would see at meijers or walmart its freakin awesome fell asleep in it a few times. We been pretty messy lately and lazy. We been stressed which equals to like food missing in our house. So yeah, I have read almost my 4 book series i have. I have packed everything in the basement. I got rid of alot of stuff. We been selling stuff whatever scott sees at a house when he does work when it does have value.
Oh and I hope scotts w-2 come in soon because well we need it!!! hope and pray for the mailman because of that our sidewalks leads to a path all the way to our door very clean and nice so the lady doesn't skip our house because she feels like it because we didn't shovel in the 24 hour period that they ask. our neighbors are a pain and i cant wait to move away from them. they are loud well one is loud and annoying the rest of them are great! lol
Other than that I have been home Trying to have a girls night trying to have a day to my self when scott works and trying to keep a house clean when TWO of us have been making it dirty and one is doing all the cleaning UGH! Oh and Im thinking of going to FIA and getting on food stamps also. We probably wont get much but its better than nothing.The least they can do like last time is sit me down for less than a minute tell me no and talk down to me to the point that i cry bc im stressed and send me out the door bc they dont care.
Take Care Everyone Please! Weathers been crappy!
♥

Men

2009-01-02T10:35:00.002-05:00

It seems whatever I do, I can not please em. It's so annoying. I'm glad Scott is going to work or I could pull our every strain of my hair. I hate living with people sometimes.
We haven't figured what the hell we are doing. I got a quote if I used a U-Haul and towed our car and dropped it off down there. It comes pretty expensive. Let's say just a 1000! That would leave me with 500 for gas with to hope and pray that will carry a heavy U-Haul to Virginia. Yeah right! I told him I'm willing to sit back in Michigan while he lives there so We have enough to go down. That idea is better than ditching everything behind. So he has to figure out what he wants more if we came down to this situation. Me or our stuff. Were just screwed. We never moved before, this is our first experience and i don't expect it to go well. I only hope it goes better the next time around.
I have been packing and Downstairs basement against one wall I have certain line of boxes. I have some saved for the day were moving. So I have like 4 rows downstairs. I have saved two tubs for the Kitchen. Two tubs for my glass stuff. Two tubs came from the Basement, One tub came from upstairs. I have a 50 gallon tub for all of our clothes. I need to pull one out for our blankets. I also need to separate and go through the two tubs from the basement in hopes that i can trash things and only have one.I have one tub of Christmas decorations. I still have like 7 tubs left from when I bought but Im not totally done I wish I was because I would be turning in those 7 tubs and getting my money back.
But I'm going to get off of here and clean or pack or do nothing to piss Scott off. He is really on my nerves! Ugh MEN!! Or should I say boys?!
Take Care Everyone
♥

Not Surprising

2008-12-30T11:12:00.003-05:00

That is what Scott and I are. Screwed.
He was suppose to get paid for the days he had off and now its official we were screwed. Now we are painfully out of two weeks of no pay.
We went and seen a concert Sunday because I bought the tickets like a month ago and the concert was absolutely amazing. No words can describe how freaking cool it was.
Then also I have been packing. At this very moment I have two tubs done. I know not a lot but I'm working on it.
I have told Scott that time is getting closer for everything to get done and somethings going to go wrong on us. Something is and we know it. We don't know what but something is going to ruin our plan. I said if that something happens i will ditch almost all of our shit behind us. I will take our animals some food some clothes our prized possessions and drive to were we need to go and fuck the rest of the shit. I can't buy back memories but I can buy back things like a bed something to eat off of and things like that.I'm not going to keep my happy little ass in this state one month longer than needed because we cant afford something.. I will make sure my two feet make it out of this state. Whatever happens from there happens. I'm ready to leave. I will do it one way or another.
New years is coming up, its like the only stupid thing I don't like celebrating.I like the resolutions because it was a great idea to a new year but celebrating a new year is a little too far. I have many reasons on why and I just hate it. So, for Scott's enjoyment I get to pretend to be happy that day and celebrate a new year at whosoever house were going too.
But I have made new year resolutions, My new years resolution is to get off our feet next year and live good. If we can do that then, I want give some one a Christmas on Christmas day. Give them presents and food. And that if that follows through then I would like to do it every year that Scott is Active. So hopefully next year we will be off our feet and stable to do it.
but that is about it in my world. I have been reading packing cleaning sleeping and slipping on ice
Take Care Everyone
♥

Merry Christmas

2008-12-24T10:27:00.003-05:00

I have been a little bit busy, Scott was in the hospital. He got 4 staples but they healed now and only has two left in his head. So that is good!
It's Christmas eve, so tomorrow is Christmas and a busy day. Not looking forward for the busy day but it will be rewarding. Then also the day after Christmas I will be shopping and will be picking up deals and things to start packing. Fun Fun. Money has been a bit of an issue on our hands and truthfully, i don't know how we are going to afford to move to any state but we will. Well rather don't have much of a choice.
Still trying to sell my treadmill, I keep getting ladies pushing it off saying ill come get it this day and then that day they call and say the next. This is the second lady that has done that. we have lowered the price too big time. We just want it for well food in our house. We have meat because my husband got a deer and we have that meat. So were good on that and thats all we have. Hopefully I can get this treadmill out for 150. It was at 200. i just want it gone.So I can slightly have a living room back except for the Christmas tree. I hate looking at our tree with no presents lol that will change obviously next year. Can't wait!
My animals have been rather good, Cats have been in more trouble than the dog.
It wont stop snowing its annoying because i came down sick sitting outside all day either shoveling pushing are car atleast passed the sidewalk so we dont get a ticket and helping others. So, this is a pain in my rear end snowfall.
Oh because my husband was in the hospital that his boss keeps sending him home saying that not yet and Scott wants to work in a way and not. He isn't suppose to come back until this Monday now. So he has this week off. Truly i don't mind all of this if i know he is getting paid. they said they were going to pay the days he misses and since we haven't got a check yet and that ain't till this Friday we wont know anything and if it is true till we sit down and look at the print out and see. But until then i have the right to worry.
Thats about a quick update that I can give on my life at the moment. I just want to do something than be home and thats not possible yet, So im just antsy and a bit hungry and not willing to eat deer for breakfast. But tonight im seasoning some meat up hopefully Scott and I can come home tomorrow for a nice dinner i make then eating everywhere else.
Well, take care everyone and be careful
♥

I'll always be waiting, I'll always be here

2008-12-08T11:06:00.002-05:00

So, I haven't been up to too much. Cleaning and hanging with our friends. Time keeps on going by. I have been still looking at houses. Scott and I are thinking of getting a 3 bedroom house. Only because there are really shitty houses put up for 2 bedroom and give like no yard or anything but if we look at like 3 bedrooms it shows a whole lot more. there is this one house they was about 1500 for us to move in the deposit would be waived and its a 3 bedroom and its gorgeous. It has a master bedroom, which i love already and a pool outside. We keep seeing some houses like near a river or such and Scott would love that. Some houses are just in the middle of the woods which is nice too. Some landlords are stupid on there though. Your modify your search to what you like. People will hit animals are allowed but in there description of the house they say no pets allowed. its annoying.
Soldier just sitting real tall on the couch staring outside and enjoying it. If Scott and I take him for a car ride he enjoys it, but when I take soldier he growls barks at people very protective. We gave him a ride one day and we had to stop and get some gas and Scott was pumping it and soldier was just trying to follow Scott and if a person he seen walked by he just sat there and watched him happy like lol If i go to pick Scott up its the other way around. its so cute. sometimes he forgets that there is windows and hits his head. Not like he feels it but he remembers lol
Oh yeah Soldier one night went pee on the floor and i slapped him behind and he sat there walked away like he didnt feel or let alone acknowledged he did anything. usually when hes bad he runs for the hills. this time he just didnt care so i take him back to the pee put his face in it tell him no show he was bad slapped his behind and he just walked away..i grabbed my floppy shoe showed him his pee and took my shoe tapped him on the head with it he acknowledged it and ran for the hills. So my slaps are pointless now till i get my shoe out..dam dog
Oh and he LOVES gloves, he found a pair of Scott's work gloves and ate the middle fingers of them and left em alone lol Thank god scott has more than one pair of gloves but soldier made sure everyone could see his middle finger lol
Well I need to do laundry maybe some dishes there isnt many. Figure out dinner so it can thaw too. So have a good week.
Take Care Everyone
♥

Bills

2008-12-05T07:52:00.002-05:00

I have been figuring bills out and they are looking on the brighter side, I mean not this month obviously its December and people need presents. But the months after that are looking dam good. I got bills figured out and hopefully I can pull together everything I need to make it off base.Just a lot of saving.
It's been nice the last few days spending with Scott have gone great. I mean they usually do but some days i just and wonder how I can be so lucky. He is a great guy. I really never stopped counting down, from when were moving but inside of me I want it to slow down. Other part of me I want it to hurry up. I want to get out of this state, but I don't want my husband deployed. God this is so selfish. I have this feeling he is going with the rest of them at this base. A few months to a welcome home to a new state and he will be gone. This time its dangerous. I will take on all responsibilities again and it sucks.I know it comes with the job. There is a whole lot of other things that can happen too, but ARGH! I just got use to him being home.
Enough sadness. It's December! It wont stop snowing and I have been driving in it and I do not like but I deal with it. I rented more free tv seasons. been watching those and i have been to the library picking up some books that I have been really interested in.
I need to clean though...ugh. Soldier being a pain lately. He is getting jealous lately. Example: Last night Scott and I were laying next to each other trying to fall asleep and soldier is constantly moving and walk on the bed lays next to Scott and then doesn't like it gets up lays next to me on the other side of the bed and then goes back and forth. We know what he wants. So Scott and I stop playing footsie and move our selfs away from each other a bit and soldier gets excited and lays between us and lays down and snores practically instantly but couldn't fall asleep on either side of us.He does that on the couch too tries to get up on our laps to get between or when one person stands up to get something like a glass of water like a second and soldier is automatically sitting in that spot or laying down thinkings its fine and/or usually leans next to the person that is left on the couch saying hey look at me hey. dumb dog lol He is growing again finally! Since he isnt sick any more. With his army collar i use to put my hand in there with a very loose fit and be able to turn my hand and he still was fine and not getting choked it was very loose. Now i can get my hand in there but its not as loose i can't turn my hand so, he is growing. i think he is done loosing teeth every time i think he is done he seems to show me he isnt.in the past month or so the only thing he has chew up of ours is a glove or two and thats it.
Well im tired, im going to sleep and then i got to wake up and clean
Take Care Everyone
♥

Look at this!

2008-12-03T10:28:00.010-05:00

I like this house a lot!!! I have been looking online at houses that are near Fort Eustis.
This house is a 2 bedroom 1 bath. With pets there is a $200 deposit. That's isn't bad because the rent is 750 which is affordable. Deposit is 400. Estimated monthly utilities at this house is 110 which isn't bad. It has microwave stove fridge washer dryer. Fenced in yard, it has a security alarm system, it also not counting a "room" is a game room. It has air condition, ceiling fans, its cable ready, the laundry has its own room area.also room for some storage. Now your thinking how am i going to get all this money....haha i don't know but I would LOVE to have a house like this. But the best part is being military if there is any discount to this house which there is because it will say or what not. There IS a discount on rent, waived/reduced application fee and waived/reduced security deposit. Which is AWESOME!!! lol Now in hopes this house sticks around long enough and no one gets it because i want it. Also 10 minutes away from the base. Which is not bad! Also there is an act upon landlords they can put on there house. It's called a Military clause, if anything happens and we both get sent overseas and we are in the middle of a lease, it is allowed to be broken with no penalty.But he has to received a PCS longer than 90 days. A PCS is a perment change of station. Which this house has and its very nice. The comment on he makes the landlord on his post he wants a professional that needs piece and quite at home. Because i guess its really quite area. Only thing I find weird haha the house number is one digit and thats odd. its near alot of stuff and its one mile from a beach. which we can walk that!

Here are some pictures. the back needs some love but its a good home.Use your scroll on your mouse to move em down.

Now I see these houses posted and some are just ridiculous. okay is any one knows my ex matt and if you seen his house you will know what im talking about. its tiny and small. Well im finding like 7 or 8 houses like that for 800+ a month and its barely a one bedroom house and it has alot of yard space and that is about it! this is the most decent house i have found that i like granted i have alot of time to look around and this is only off one site but i like it.
I was suppose to start my period today and it has not came...dun dun dun lol lets hope it doesn't!
Take care everyone
♥

Been awhile

2008-12-01T09:45:00.002-05:00

I noticed I haven't wrote in awhile on here. Sorry :(
So what have I been up too? Well thanksgiving has passed and that went pretty well. We stocked up on food because we are low. But that is expected its the holidays were always really tight on the holidays. Well we shouldn't be next year.
We have 3 months and were gone, 4 months top. It's crazy. I have not packed one box yet. I don't know why. I probably wont start till about mid January and it will probably kick me in the ass for it. Any extra money we get for Christmas is going right to plastic bins and a GPS. One that doesn't have a monthly charge. The bins so I can start packing. I plan on picking up all the red and green bins on sale after Christmas and use those. Everything of our stuff will be protected so no matter how we are getting to Virginia they can take some damage and cardboard boxes can't do that.
Any of our extra money has been going to gas and driving to Owosso. Like 5 bucks gets us a quarter of gas. Go figure this last Sunday we went to get gas before heading to Corunna and then hit into town and the prices were lower than Lansing.
Our family came in from Washington and spent 45 bucks in gas. that is really cheap and they have a van. they spent like 20 bucks on tolls. So in hopes since they are sort of in that area of the united states that it wont cost much for us either.
Still haven't decided on or off base. I don't know that has to be in our papers when putting in for full time. If so we will probably stick wit on base and then move to get off base. But we will find that shit out next month. So I will have a much bigger update next month than anything.
New year resolutions are coming up with the new year. Been thinking about those. This will be the second new year for scott and I. Next year we will be hitting the big 5 year mark. Sad we would of only spent like 2 new years together haha. I actually don't even like new years. So I don't mind =] It will also next year be our two year marriage. Our marriage so far has came a long way. I can say, it wasn't how i expected it or seen it years ago.
But i'm going to clean and throw away extra stuff like always.That's the only thing I have been doing good at. Tearing everything up and throwing away no good junk.
Take Care Everyone, Don't forget to keep your selves warm
♥

Hives on Dogs

2008-11-22T14:07:00.002-05:00

Yeah, Did my searching even more today. Soldier woke up with the bumps again. He got a bath and what not. I found out they are hives and every where I have searched people just give him benedryl 3 times a day till gone. Now if he gets it every day because of allergies and we dont know what it is, Because its hard to pin point an allergy on a dog that we will have to watch out. We will have to get into some bill money or what not but he will feel better. i mean he doesn't scratch them or bite em or let alone bother em. But they are the size of golf balls on his body all over. It's because something is bothering him and we don't know what. We will be changing his food too. But the more he sleeps the better he gets. poor baby :( when he has the hives in the morning he sticks to my side and sleeps on me
But we are going to the store to check prices out and what not. Things are going pretty good. We had some trouble with Cashing scotts check but we got that figured out. Also gas in lansing is 1.54 which is REALLY CHEAP!
Take Care Everyone
♥

Poor Puppy

2008-11-21T07:48:00.002-05:00

Last night he had some new things we were eating and this morning i wake up to my dog that has quarter size bumps all over his rear end. I did some searching, its an irritation to there skin. A good cold bath with baking soda sitting on the bumps will make them go away. It also can be an allergic reaction. He did have a few new things last night so, That is probably it. They don't bother him they don't itch they don't hurt. They are just there. I feel bad. I wont be giving that to him again! Even though he really liked it.Pit bulls have extremely sensitive skin and from you touching something and going to pet him right after can make him break out.Learning new things everyday
My husband i still call crazy, thinks im pregnant. I tell him everyday he is nuts! lol I got hunny you got awhile for a test.
The whole moving thing coming into a new prospective. Well they now only reimburse moving money after wards. They will reimburse every cent you paid to move and more. They will for what you pay and then they will take the weight of it and they have the chart the weight of my stuff and get more money. I can file for advance payment on somethings to help out. I also realized that next year hopefully *fingers crossed* that we very much should have taxes done before we move. That would be REALLY NICE! If so. but I'm just going to be saving and scrounging every cent we get. We might just be living on base. There is a site online that helps military families and that shows houses and apartment for rent and how much for deposit and also shows pictures and such. Which is really nice! But we don't have money at the moment to be living off base for a down payment if its going to cost us 1300 for a person to come move our stuff. Now I was thinking of renting one of those trucks and we move and drop off at a drop stop at Virginia and just tow our vehicle behind. We have to think very openly about this because we need money obviously. Now it would be much easier if we had our taxes done in time before we moved. Because your suppose to have your yearly things back by end of February and we will have to run to a tax place to get it done.So it will be close but, we are leaving no matter what!!
But other than that, Things are going good. A big cement thing fell on scott yesterday and he got sent home bc it looked dam bad but hes fine. which is weird.
sunday we will be in town bc scott is going hunting with aunt sylvia. Im going to visit with tegan for the day and grandpa. we get to cook supper for the ones who are hunting fun fun lol
Take Care Everyone
♥

Virginia with consquences

2008-11-20T06:59:00.004-05:00

Yeah, that is right. Yet again some army things are getting changed around and we will get partial screwed on this whole moving thing. Not only that we will be living there for about 5 months and Scott will be going to Iraq. That is what was said by his friend last night from Virginia. I did explain earlier they have so many transportation's they go through before the next one gets deployed. When we get there, there is a chance he will not be put into that one, his friends group and not get deployed. But they will be going straight to Iraq and not Afghanistan and like I said last night to Scott, If he goes I'll be home waiting. I support him. If you had any other chance to go, It would be best to go with some one you know and trust than go with no one. So that is the sad news we got last night. Now if I came pregnant soon Scott wouldn't miss the birth but would miss a birthday. But if I got pregnant and then he is gone, He can come home for like two weeks for the birth and go back. But the thing is we will have to pay for him to come home. Then I will be stuck with a newborn and have no clue what to do.That is my biggest fear become pregnant Scott miss out on some important things and leave me yet clueless behind. I know its going to happen that he is going to miss out and stuff. But our first child, Me having not a single clue on to what to do with a baby compared to Scott who has a general idea. It will be hard and I will struggle. I know I have mother instincts somewhere inside of me that will come out and help.
Maybe its a good thing, If I don't come pregnant between here and when he leaves. If he leaves. Then again maybe its bad because who said he is coming home.
I'm a little confused emotional a little bit of everywhere. I think I'm tired so, I think I'm going to fall back asleep its only 7 14 am right now anyways so, good night and for some of you good morning.
I'll explain more later on the moving thing and I realized we are like a grand short from what is needed to get there. Unless I find a very sweet and very generous landlord to help and deal with us. Or we may just have to go on base.
Take Care Everyone, I need to stay stress free YAY lol
♥

my heart

2008-11-19T12:45:00.003-05:00

My heart shaped ring came in yesterday!! It's sort of my Christmas present from Scott he got with our money and we ordered it and it came in actually last night and its so pretty. I can't stop staring at it. We have to put the other half of it on layway though which is fine. It'd be so worth it though. Scott's should be coming in soon too.His has been ordered since he lost his. I told him this is the last time we are spending a 100 bucks on a ring for you to keep loosing. So if you loose this one, You will only get bands at walmart for like 30 bucks. I'm not going to keep wasting money for you to loose. My ring is sooo pretty. It is 1/4 carat diamond or half. I will have to check. I can't keep my eyes off of it.They cut it like a heart. It fits even if my finger swells it fits not like my promise ring. That is why I kept wearing fake rings because my real one cut into my self. It was just a promise ring and Scott has always wanted to get me a wedding ring. Because I guess there are different selection of rings like that at the jewelry place. Truthfully, to me a ring is a ring and its the meaning on how your using it. But man its pretty. Now there is a band that wraps with it and it makes the heart stand out. That band is like 500 bucks. We can put 10% down and pay monthly whatever we can afford to pay it off. That is how JB Robinson works. Thats the only place we ever go too.
But today is girls day! Well every Wednesday is girls day. But there is a problem with that. I lost the cell phone and I can't leave with out it because Scott doesnt know Ashley number. So I'm stuck at home till I find it. OR I can fast clean this whole house and invite her over. I haven't decided but I need to decide fast. I love my Wednesdays with no boys :]
So I should be going, But I thought I would share I got my Christmas present and its gorgeous. I can't wait to show it to people lol We have a picture of the band on the back of there buisness card so I can show you what it will look like once we get all the money and work up for that one. but its a beauty!
Take Care Everyone
♥

Brrrr

2008-11-18T14:21:00.003-05:00

I just got bills done...fun fun.
This house is still a mess, but every time I start im back on the couch sleeping. I blame the weather. It's like cold to curl on the couch with hot coco and sleep. So I blame the weather.
I woke up this morning with a HORRIBLE leg cramp usually lately my feet been cramping but my leg hurt so bad. I sat up dropped back to the bed trying to stretch my leg some how i turned my self in a complete circle. It hurt my leg still hurts alittle bit from that this morning. Lately my feet been cramping and I really dont like that because when I have a cramp my toes curl and it hurts so bad because my toes will curl as far as they can curl down and I can't control it. I cut my toe nails last time that happen my toe nail went into my foot a bit and it hurt. Scott thinks it's funny sometimes. Because when I get a cramp I try to get him to help especially when my foot is cramping and I can only get out a few words bc of the pain and he finds it funny some how lol So I just stop asking for help haha
Scott and I have been trying still this month to have a baby. Scott thinks im pregnant now and I tell him hes crazy and that I tell him when a test comes out positive then I will believe it. :]
We were talking about names though because Scott thinks I'am and he wants to be sure we still have some names in order just in case. But If it's a boy its David Ray Johnson. David is Scott's middle name and his dads first name. Ray is his grandpas middle name. If its a girl, then its going to be Avalynn Jean Johnson. You wont say it like it shows LOL Ahvalynn is how it sounds. Lynn is my brother and my dad middle names and Jean is my moms middle name. So that is the two names picked out. So whatever the sex is when time comes around and I become pregnant. Those are the names.
Well I'm going to go and get some tissue, my nose is been runny. Ugh lol Try to clean also. Probably napping.
Oh my chicken came out excellent! the homemade stuffing didnt come out so great but everything else came out really good. Left overs are today.
Take Care Everyone
♥

My Snow is Melting :[

2008-11-17T14:13:00.004-05:00

the sun came out today and is melting it all down. That sucks! But whatever!
Today I'am going to try to clean and slow cook a chicken that im going to inject with some flavoring, or maybe just the regular butter and garlic. But yumm! Or I was thinking of adding some potatoes and veggies with it while cooking. I haven't decided. We got these chickens from the food drive and I haven't cooked em yet. Well we only need one chicken for Scott and I and I still have one more in my freezer. Maybe put some stuffing in it..Yeah I don't know what im doing, but I'm making a chicken.
I got the furnace going and I need to start doing some laundry to keep this house warm. It's been a little chilly the last few days.
I'm in a pretty good mood today I need to clean, So I should get off of here or atleast get the chicken going.
Take Care Everyone
♥

Interesting

2008-11-16T21:08:00.004-05:00

Well, We are doing good. It's been snowing!!! I like it Scott and I have already had a snowball fight lol
The animals are doing good. Soldier doesn't know what to think of the snow. I kicked it on him because we got about 3 inches or so on the ground. The snow covered his face and he sat there like what the heck haha. he didn't know if he was bad or if i was playing but it was cute. then Scott made this big ball of snow and put it in soldiers water bowl and soldier got excited ran to it and bit it real fast and then realized what it was hahahahaha stupid dog. But Scooter is quite happy he wants outside more because of the snow and Jasmin is like stay away your wet and cold.
The whole baby making thing is going good. I don't know if I'm pregnant but I could be. Yesterday we sat down and ate dinner and then I was fine. Then I was like I made cake got it out cooled down and such. Frosted it sat down to eat mine because i made two mini ones. I got half way through and something was wrong about it or the smell of the frosting, my stomach turned. i gave it to scott and said take it I can't look at it or smell it. Then i hear him eating it because he didnt want his but when i gave him mine he was like oh well shes not finishing it. That has gross i see in the corner of my eye my husband was getting it out of my sight he was chowing down on it and thats when i said what are you doing stop hes like whats wrong and then i ran up to the bathroom and puked. I felt fine afterwards and before we ate I was fine. It could be maybe that i have had a cold lately or that I may be pregnant but we dont know and its too soon to tell. But today has went well. I dinner around 4 pm not like last night at like 10 pm to 11. So scotts really excitied and truthfully, I dont know if I'am. Like I dont know what to expect to say hey im pregnant but I cant really say either that I'm not sick. Because I have had a cold recently. So I don't know. Maybe it was just bad food for a night, but Scott ate it too also. Everything I ate that day so did scott. When food usually upsets me if gives me runs not puking. So It was alittle odd. So the whole family knows and has there fingers crossed.
We went into town today. It was alittle sad at first but got alot better.Well we stopped at his moms and we drove to Ovid to visit grandma in the elders home place. His aunt donnie is also there too. I never met her and she always that I have heard wanted to meet me. So we visited them both. That place gives me the creeps. Alot of old people staring off or dont even have a clue on what there doing. It's not something I want to look forward too. But towards the end of the stay it was better. Then we took off dropped off his mom and uncle. Then visited my mom and then went to grandpas. Then at grandpas we went to Jcpennys and then into Cheasing to visit Angela because she had her second girl and we havent seen her. Also her husband Nathan is home until next week sunday before he goes back overseas. Then after that we went back to grandpas and left to come home and forgot to stop at my brothers about the car. Busy day though and I'm really wore out. I could of took like a 4 hour nap between my moms and grandpas. Scott didnt even remember sleeping at my moms hahaha i was talking to him and he swore he was up the whole time and I'm like no its okay you were tired he felt alittle bad because we came to visit. We were up late last night bc i got sick and we ate dinner late. We were excitied. So waking up late and we wanted to wake up early and didnt get much sleep
But I'm going to go rest on the couch and relax and probably sleep
Take Care Everyone
♥

We got a new car

2008-11-14T09:09:00.002-05:00

I didn't think I would like it at all because it was a cavalier but when I was just sitting in it driving home I loved it. Its such a nice car. I want to drive it now but I cant lol But I will be soon. I thought i would rest alittle bit. Scott just went into work. I'm not liking this rainy weather much ugh! My cold is going away slowly. My house is still a mess. But were doing good haha. We went to get gas on our way home last night. Scott had to follow me because we dont have it plated or anything. I looked down needed gas it was just under the last quarter mark, filled it between there and over full bc it hasnt moved for 23 bucks lol
well i should go now thought i would give a small update.

take care everyone
♥

Been Awhile

2008-11-10T11:12:00.005-05:00

I have been a bit busy.

Well, Scott got his bonus so we been busy. We planned 2000 for moving and 3500 for a car. But we are now doing 3000 for a car and 1500 for moving. That's finding a place and gas to get there. We are also getting money to move so yeah. We spent the 1000 difference really easy. We seen a doctor for the price of 150 bucks. They did a papsmear and other test to make sure I was alright gave me a prescription also because im sick. Also Scott was in there so that was another 150 for him. We are checking up on some things with him too. It's been since I was in our old apartment on Corunna Ave since I have seen a doctor.I think it was very much needed.Or let alone been in an office.But I didnt want to go any where free because they are just going to tell you if something seriously is wrong or your fine. I dont want that. I want an acutal check up or what not. We have another check up coming up for both of us then were done. Then after that we bought a dog crate and two dishes for his crate. So, were done spending.
I figured bills and we got what we planned or wanted. Which is good. Then alittle more because we went to the doctors and such.So we dipped into alittle of our planned money but the planned money will be coming out today and getting into my brothers account so we wont spend the rest between here and when we leave.
Scott have been getting told they are going to be working longer. He already goes in early. I told him better work his butt off. It's going to take like a month to get caught up with bills and on track.
We didn't realize, we got to pay rent this last month and then this first. So then the next month we can be on track and bills will be late again next month too but we will be caught up so they wont be late. If that makes sense. This goes to every bill I have to even freakin pay. But its going to hurt us alittle bit because its christmas and everyone will be hopefully getting presents this year.Our list is Doug and dawn with the kids, Scotts parents and sara, Doug and aimee and kids, Tegan Sylvia Grandpa and Amanda John and Vinnie. So we have a list. We sort of wish we could just sit home for once, but that would be pretty stupid.
Our holiday plans is to go to them this year and then next year we are choosing one of the holidays, So say we choose Thanksgiving we arent coming to christmas BUT The year after we are going to Christmas and not Thanksgiving.Then it just switchs on and off. So we can atleast say we will be in town once a year. Hopefully more but I cant promise that.
So Scott and I got new DS's and a tv. That was our extra money. Oh and his christmas present December 28th we are seeing Trans Syberian Orchestra, I'm so freaking excitied!! We have always wanted to see them for like ever! its our present to each other! It better be for 50 bucks a person. It will be in Lansing too. Our friend Ashley and Elvis bought tickets right after us so we are all sitting together. We have the seats and such. We are the starting of a new row lol we are 1 and 2. of like row 18 section 2. It should be here the tickets in like 3 days. So im thrilled!! They are selling fast too. Because the day before I looked at prices and stuff and they were selling section 1 tickets. The next day when we bought them they were section 2. So they have three big sections in this place. So, they are selling really fast.
The cats and Soldier have got there flea treatments done and worm stuff. The worm stuff is specifically made for round worms and that is what soldier has. Today he has been puking them up dead and he got his treatment last night.It's really disgusting but there dead and its working. Now I feel bad for Jasmin. I gave soldier the flea stuff. The stuff you put on the back of the neck well the order was Soldier, Jasmin and then Scooter. I get them all done look over and soldier is cleaning the back of Jasmin neck and she is allowing him!!!! So the stuff didn't get into Jasmin skin it went into soldier.. They got there flea treatment done a few days before the worm stuff. The flea stuff has worked on Scooter and Soldier but not Jasmin. I can't give her another till next month.Because they are just sort of living on her only. I see like two on soldier and they don't last long.So they will all be getting treated next month too.But thank you mom for giving the stuff it has been working.
Well I'm going clean or what not. It's dirty here.
Take Care Everyone
♥

I'm Dancing on Clouds

2008-11-05T07:48:00.006-05:00

Well, I had a period last month and if you know I'm not regular. Well I started mine on time today. Yeah meaning I know when I'm ovulating and I know when to try for a baby!!! Nothing can be any better. I hate periods but this would be worth it! I'm sick of everyone else getting pregnant and having babies. It's my turn dam it. I'm sick of trying and getting nothing. Thinking you are and horrible finding out on a test your not. Every tear from finding that your not blows. It hurts badly. BUT I know when I'm ovulating this month YEY I could so tell the whole world because I NEVER have a period that has went a perfect straight two months in years. So Scott is pretty happy. Probably because I have been working out! I claimed Tuesdays my lazy day though. You weren't suppose to know that but Tuesday I'm relaxing Jackson.
Scott is going to try to get out of work early today So we can get into town and tell Scott's mom about our moving. We noticed that the whole family knows but Aimee and Mom. Well, Thanksgiving is coming up and don't want to let his mom realize she was the last one to know and that were only telling her now because she will find out on the holiday. We want to tell her and not everyone else. Which makes full sense.But if he doesn't get the day off then its not happening..
Also Scott is very much near to a raise at his new job and a new position, There is a few guys up for the position and Scott didn't say hey pick me I would like to do it, they picked him and put him in with the few guys that want it. The position is team leader. His pay an hour does not go up though, but since he is team leader and they go to a house and see a tree standing in the way and would look better gone, they make about lets say 600 from that tree so Scott is going to get 100 for making the call. That goes the same with dry wall or carpets or anything that is really bad or what not. He will get part of the profit they are making.Which that is really nice. He has building keys and keys to every house they own at this house too. Most men there dont have that. We will need the money I can say that. It will help us catch up on bills thats for sure!
Oh another good thing, Scott found a kite at a house. A really good kite. We are going to go kite flying too today is Scott gets the half of the day and we head into town and hope its windy because We want to fly it!! Grab Justin and go fly a kite! Break the world Guinness record like every year, We really should get a person out there or video record it all and send it in. Well the video camera technically wont even be able to see it by eye. We will have to get binoculars like always and find it. It's thrilling and fun. One time it got late and we were tired so we just tied the kite off to the fence and walked away and came back to it in the morning still in the air. So We untied it and add more string.
Well I'm going to exercise or eat..I'm starving. I might get pregnant this month! My hopes are flying high and they shouldn't be because I may get disappointed again like always.
So lets hope and pray
♥

Oh soldier is also still teething. He found his AFLAC duck because we got it when we had AFLAC at bannans and he found out it feels excellent on his teeth and he wont let it go a second without him. He TOOK the duck OUTSIDE yesterday to go potty he wouldn't give it up before either. I didn't want it to fall in the mud but he held it in his mouth went potty and walked around with it and came back in

Ugh

2008-11-04T20:20:00.003-05:00

I hate waiting for Scott to come home, he works so dam late its ridiculous I have to wake up really early or stay up really late to spend time with him. We have like the worse hours in the world for a job. I just want him home.
I'm so glad voting is today, so all this can end. Maybe whoever is president, will remove that fear from my mind that my husband will be in a very dangerous area and far away from me.
Well I just wanted to say, I miss Scott and want him home. I'm starting to feel better. Just slept it off really. Got like no house cleaning done either. But I feel better everyday which counts I guess.
Well I'm going to go and do something. Maybe find the remote and change the stupid tv.

take care everyone
♥

Sick of being Sick

2008-11-03T08:48:00.006-05:00

I'm so fighting this cold and it blows. I have been sweating horrible bad all day for no reason. Yesterday I opened up the house windows it was so hott. I heard on the news though woman that sweat more have a lower chance of cancer! lol i hate sweating its gross.

So this morning, Scott gave me a kiss in the morning and said by i went to close the door and he said wait and picked up this chain off the ground. his dog tag chain. we looked at the chain and realized its broke and that is how it happen then we were looking on the ground for his tags.He had his dog tags and his wedding ring on the chain..yeah this is like his second ring he has lost. But we didnt see anything. If our neighbors took em, I could beat the living shit out of him. But we are still looking the chain was sort of packed in the drive way barely visible. so the stuff could be packed too.

Scott was gone practically all day yesterday! I was shocked. He is suppose to go up in rank next month. He is ober excited. I was reading some papers he has to give his SGT that he has to fill out or what not. Scott doesn't know I read over half the papers that come into this house.But the paper asked some questions short term goals and long term. But they are to be better husband and soldier. To get his tv back and to beat his pt test. Oh and to save money. I was like awww.

I finally ate military food in a bag. haha. Next month Scott is going to grab one for my dad. This one we ate. They are the meals on the go. If your in combat this is what you eat. well they gave them some because they were on the road driving all day. He was like we are going to share this and the next one is your dads. It had Oatmeal cookie. It was dry and crumbly, because all the bags are air seal tight. Dry peanuts, Beef Ravioli fruit punch pears and coffee. Well it was pretty interesting, because obviously they don't have bowls or anything to eat with. So you wonder how they eat it... Well you have water and you open up lets say the fruit punch bag and put water in with the mixture and swish it around and you drink out of the bag. Not just that but the fruit punch was amazingly cold too. So they had something in the fruit mixture or maybe it was the bag but it kept it cold for quiet some time. Then you have your meal the beef ravioli well you have this green bag you open it up and there is another bag inside that but you leave it alone. You have your ravioli bag and you stick in the green bag add some water and close it. You can watch the water inside bubble it gets so hott! the bag inside the green bag is making the water bubble some reaction or something and that bag gets freakin hot to even touch. then you pull out the bag ravioli and open it and eat it. It tasted worse than can ravioli at the store. With the coffee they dont have cups they open the coffee pouch, its like the size of a sugar pack. you take the coffee pour it in your mouth take some water swish it and swallow you got coffee. mmmm, nothing like good morning coffee. That was pretty much it. They get a napkin sometimes or a wet one. Oh and they get a spoon too. thats it. It was pretty interesting.

Oh Scott was also telling me while they are overseas they eat well. Because I guess like they need it or what not. I mean like graduation dinner well. You can have a choice to eat steak every day.

Yeah so, I need to stretch and work out. Get my minutes in and log it. Then probably sleep off this sickness or well sweat it out. I don't know why I sweat so dam bad when I'm sick. I mean it gets bad. I been drinking tons of water so, I'm not dehydrating my self at all

But I thought I would share, I ate military food. It was sick! lol The peanuts was the best part haha. The fruit punch wasnt too bad. Soldier is getting big. He cant even stand up right in his crate any more he has to slouch down. I can't wait till we get his god dam bonus. Get these fleas gone and him a bigger crate. He knows now though when he is bad to run for the hills and where he runs to is the best part. In his crate and he lays down. So he knows when he is bad, but still does it..jerk

Take Care Everyone
♥

Did you set your clock back?

2008-11-02T10:28:00.004-05:00

Soldier all he wants is his front 5 teeth for christmas lol Poor baby is missing his front teeth because they fell out =[ He isn't like sleeping alot recently though, he should be and his fur is darking in some spots and lighting in others. it looks like his ass end is turning white.
But I just got done exercising then I'm going to take a shower after this blog and then eat some breakfast.
Our cousin had her baby yesterday. Congrats. Her husband is coming home i believe in like a week he is in Iraq.
But Scott got some new decorating things for his outfit. Little thing he puts on his beret and then a thing to the side of his arm to show where he is stationed at. They are called the Cyclones. I guess many years ago there was a bad torandoes ripping through down south and no one would fly threw them to save the people. So these guys risked all there lifes got in a plane flew threw the torandoes and saved the people. They were named the Cyclones. Grand ledge is a base that will front our soldiers for home safety than for a war. They I guess were known for it. Then about two years ago, they couldn't afford the base to go on any longer and they were going to close it down. Then Granholm stepped in and said no because she heard of the story and gave them like a million dollars to keep them alive. I have alittle bit more respect for grandholm, even though I still don't like her. But Scott liked it there. I guess everyone was picking on him. His SGT got him too lol. They had a random pt test because they were bored and Scott passed it.
Scott was able to come home last night too and wake up and go to the base this morning.Which was really nice I guess they allow and do that there. So it made Scott happy but he woke up late this morning ekk. lol He had to drive to Grayling today in one of those hummer like things. I guess when he heard that he could come home he got excited and asked the SGT to make sure and then he said yeah you can go home. So Scott grabs his stuff and gets to the door and the SGT goes I was kidding, you can't leave. Scott got really disappointed made his bed laid down in it and then his SGT turns around realizes it and said I was just kidding go home and Scott is like I'm not moving unless I'm allowed to go home, He goes you can go home. Scott jumped up really fast and ran out haha. I guess the guys were doing that the whole day yesterday to him. He didn't know when they were serious or not.But he came home and I opened the door with a confused look thinking he forgot something and he has this huge smile and said I finally get to spend some of my weekend with you and picked me up lol God I Love him. He is way more than what I asked for in a husband.
But, I'm stinking it up pretty badly. I need a shower lol. Hopefully I wont have the annoyance of a dog trying to get in. He does that. He did that once while Scott and I were in the shower he jumped in and looked up at us and then were like get out and turned the shower head on him thinking it will make him jump back out and soldier looked up and started biting the water falling on him... the dumb ass liked it so we had to pick his ass up to get him out LOL I have a weird dog.
Take Care Everyone
♥

A new Month

2008-11-01T07:40:00.006-04:00

Is today :]

It's very hard to believe my husband has been home for almost a whole month. That is outrageous! It does and doesn't feel like it. I miss him, I wish he didn't have to go this morning. We were looking for the address to the Grand Ledge Armory because that is where he goes to his one weekend a month now. If you search that up you will see the first one will say looking for people to deploy to Iraq...I turned to Scott and hes like don't worry about it, they are looking for volunteers. I go well, what if they don't get those volunteers, he goes well, there are 20 some transporters in front of me that go first before I do. We are split off in groups and there is about 50 groups and the first is the one to go before I would. I would be the 20th some group to go, I said what if those groups are gone already? He says, don't worry there not. I told him if he hears any bad news like that he better call me right away, I demanded it. So I'm alittle worried this weekend. Because well we don't know what is going on at this base this is where he will be stationed until we leave.

Scott's bringing more stuff home from work. It's nice actually. Things we can use or need. My house is SOOO DIRTY! That is what I'm doing this weekend cleaning and feeling better. Man I feel like shit. So they didn't put Scott under the table pay they put him on a payroll, but he has to pull taxes out of his own check. I don't know why, but whatever. We don't know what to save out of his checks though, I don't know how much we will need to take out. Which blows.

Scott and I got this idea thought it would be pretty, getting a few puzzles for the house and do them up. Then glue both sides put in a picture frame and use it as decoration. We can also look at it and be like we did that together. So it has double meaning! I have one puzzle done it was a 750 piece, it was alright. Nice size too. It is a lighthouse with some houses on the island that is around water. The puzzle we have its a house with tons of flowers and bushes around it.

Ugh, I'm going to take a nap and then take this dirty house on, but it will probably take me all dam weekend because its that bad. I can't wait to I find a way for Scott to input into this house to help me from time to time. He will come home, bring stuff from work wants it clean. Then dirty dishes and eats. Leaves them in there spot that he sat down and falls alseep and his dirty clothes everywhere..Alrighty.

He brought home two bags the other day, one he is using right now it has his army stuff in it and he packs it for the weekend. The other one is a thick nice bag for his green suit he has with the army. He brought home a working treadmill thingy, he is holding two stuffed horses for our friend. He has brought home some things for family in owosso... whenever we head to Owosso. When he cleans he thinks of EVERYONE! Then it sits in my house on the floor. We have some records for his mom some pots for Sylvia. I mean its never ending. We are going to have to pack our blazer when we visit and delivery these "presents" to there rightful owner and out of my house! Oh and if you need something badly around the house or just want something, I'm more than sure Scott can find it for you.

Oh also if you look at the bottom of my page I made a ticker. That ticker is how much weight I need to loose unless to be on the healthy side of the doctors chart. I guess for my height 5'10 my weight is suppose to be 135-165... Scott has me on a diet plan and we been doing it the past few days but I'm going to mark it as started today, Easier to remember. but I need a scale and I will be doing 30 minutes in the morning with three small meals a day and tons of water. It's not that bad actually I like it.We have that treadmill so I can exercise inside now, So both of us wont get sick from running outside and yet stay healthy. Hint on why Scott and I have been coming down sick. When I read that I was MORBID Obese, that did it. That's outrageous the site said I should one of two things, Start moving your ass and get motivated or admit your self to the hospital. I see why America is overweight bc they have this chart that is a bit ridiculous, no offense but most of my life before I gained weight, I was around 170 and 175 when i was on my period. That is considered over weight. So I guess from these charts I have always been over weight. Awesome. I wonder who else is over weight but If I did go to the doctors, it would be bad because I'm morbid. will probably get talked down upon. Well it's time for a change.

Well, I hope Everyone had a good Halloween and hope to have a good weekend.
Take Care Everyone
♥

Under Construction

2008-10-31T09:59:00.004-04:00

I'm trying out some new things on here. So yupp.

I put an estimated date on when we should be leaving or near it. I was counting 6 months since he has been home, it ends up in March 9th but were going to say April because of all the paper work. Glad I found the round about month though. Who knows we could even be gone in March. But the countdown is on March.

I want a good looking background and stuff and I have a lot of pink going on and I don't know If I like it so, I will be googling for more stuff. Who knows the time your looking at it, it may not even be pink hehe

So we helped our friend get a job through Scott's work place. Scott leaves this weekend for his one weekend a month. I will probably be cleaning, I get more done when he isn't around.
Today is Alan's birthday! Happy Birthday! Oh and Happy Halloween. We ate our candy so we don't have any to hand out....it didn't last haha.

Scott and I are coming down sick very slowly but we are...ugh i hate it.For once in our life we have lived at one spot more than a year, its very nice! this would be our first place longer than a year, that is terribly sad if you think about it. We moved alot too.

Well, I'm going to sleep or eat some soup...take my cold from me!!
Take Care Everyone
♥

Thankful

2008-10-30T15:06:00.003-04:00

I'm truly blessed, that my husband is still around and is by my side. It's so nice to walk into the bedroom and look to see him in bed. Waiting for me, not in another bed waiting to come home. How I just remember the simple things in life and not everything else. God can throw a million things on me and I will still have it in me to be happy, to be thankful and feel blessed on what I have. I shouldn't let my fears or what ifs get to me in anyway possible. Why ruin a moment that I have now, before it could be swipped from under my feet and gone.
Scott and I have decided Virginia because it has a beach and we heard some good scenery. It isn't too far from home and yet its far away enough for now. It also has a guy named Andy McKee living there with his wife and a little girl. Scott gained two friends while he was gone that he got really close to. I mean like Andy Mckee is more of a friend then Justin or Adam. They are like them but I would say more mature and want to do things. Not so boring and that is what he likes. They understand and yet they are like us. The other guy his name is Hubbard. That is all I know of him. I seen pictures but I have talked to Andy before on the phone. Really nice people and Scott talks about it in stories and really likes him.
At the place we want to go Euctice on base they are doing a big overhaul on base houses. They are coming all brand spanking new the time we get there they will be done. We aren't going to live on base because we heard they are very finicky than other bases. Some are not as strick. All bases are different I guess, but All utilities are paid down to your trash and your rent obviously. So we are going to live off base other than we think we should. It'd be nice and what I heard if you play it right you will have extra BAH money in your pocket.
Andy McKee lives 30 minutes from the base, I thought the 30 minutes from the beach and I asked Scott but its the base. But in his back yard is also the beach. They BAH allowance is 1100 and the house is 1400. So 300 only comes out of there pocket. It's a three bedroom house they live in. I was like wow sounds very nice! He said its a good area and good schools so far bc his daughter. Our BAH will be lower but I would like a nice place :] Maybe a beach in my back yard....:D But the beach is just a plus for now. Gotta find a place that will accept the fact I have a pitbull as a dog :[ Maybe I will just have to show his pretty face and how lovey he is for a renter to understand.
My brother doug offered to help us move, Which is really nice. I would be paying his gas and food everything that even needed for him to help me. We are going to try to get a place before we get there. By emails contact with Mckee on places we like and such. Got to talk to McKee though about it still and ask but Scott said he will do it. Mckee found out and called us like everyday for three days bc he was just so happy.
Everyone knows that Justin Adam and Scott have this weird thing of humor I should say, we have some jokes ontop of jokes. Well, even our humor confuses my family like how I would write justin on aim. The first thing I say is poopy. Well Scott already has that with Mckee, but its unicorns...The first time I talked to Mckee he told me he likes to lick windows bc it taste like unicorns...I dont understand and its so odd that i bust up laughing and he liked it. Shows I had humor, then Scott told me to tell him something about a ball but I didnt say it and he heard Scott and it made McKee laugh. Then Hubbard writes Scott and they have something weird to with Koala's and kicking them...Yeah I will fill that in more later, but I think some people find it weird but interesting on our conversations to our friends. LOL but I will be that girl on the move.
I tell you what Scott and I dam well deserve to get the hell out of here. It will be best for both of us. We always wanted to see the world and getting away from drama is like a big plus but the other big plus is that we will be together.
OMG Soldier yesterday made me feel so unbelievable sad. Like sad. We both were sitting on the couch waiting for dad we heard the blazer and we both ran to the door and I opened it because it was loud like our blazer. It wasnt..So I closed the door and said to come on and soldier didn't. He sat at that the door and you could hear his tail hitting the cupboards and he barks and barks and barks. Then he laid down and howled cried. I had to get after him to shut up bc it was getting annoying in a way and he just cried because he thought it was dad and dad was outside..It wasn't it was some one visiting our neighbors.He finally gave up and jumped on the couch and laid his head on my lap and fell asleep. I felt so bad. I wish I knew were my camera was.
Well I'm going to go work on my puzzle. Yeah I got two puzzles. I will talk to you all later.
Take Care Everyone
♥

I walk alone

2008-10-29T13:11:00.002-04:00

So today, is okay. We been having visitors more. We been spending time with Richard and Shauna. Which is cool they still owe us and such but we aren't going to let a money destroy a good friendship. He just got custody of his child. She visits sometimes. She is very adorable. She is about 6 years old I think, I will have to check into that tonight when they come over. We really don't know how to occupy our guest though when people visit. We are VERY bad at that. They seem to not mind but usually when we visit people that are getting high or drinking or video games or something is going on that occupies a group of people but not us. We don't have really anything, so we need some ideas that aren't going to exactly bore or scare away people.
We have moved on with that whole child thing, people say we aren't making the best decision and I say we are making the best decision in our position. If you can't accept or have different beliefs okay but when you see us please just don't bring it up.That would be the worse possible thing to do. We have bickered shared our opinions we clashed and we are stressed. We are pulling through but we don't want people to talk about it for years to come please.Drop it like we are and go on, that's all we ask.Also Grandpa might know and that is really bad. Scott doesn't want to hear those words of disappointment. Grandpa has high standards and Scott wants Grandpa to keep those high standards.I told Scott 14 years from now you can find Mitch and he can get his own consent as an adult to get a test done. Can't make up for the years but he can at least know if its his real father or not. No man is going to know his son better than there father.
Scott and I are trying for a family still. I will be taking a test in about a week or so, Probably will be negative and I will sit and cry but you know gotta move on and try again. I'm not giving up and either is he.
Well Scott also has his one weekend a month this weekend.We decorated our porch and I'm in hope that maybe when Scott and I move to Virginia that we will get the biggest break of our life and live drama free for awhile. We are going to be living off base too. But I will give more information on that later.
Take Care Everyone
♥

So

2008-10-27T12:39:00.003-04:00

Things finally ended between Scott and his ex. She doesn't want to take a test and prove anything and she did that last time and then finally admitted saying it wasn't his. So whatever we are walking away from this. You can't help some one that doesn't want to be helped. We can't afford a court ordered one we got a fair estimate from a lady and we might as well say goodbye to his sign up bonus completely if we did court ordered. Now if she pulled a court order on us she would be paying for it and we would do it. She is saying the same thing as she did about two years ago. But then she admitted it wasn't his. Now she hasn't admitted that yet but she probably will

So I'm going to clean relax push some of this annoyance on killing people in a video game. I made my mom a myspace with the myspace i used to talk to scotts ex. well she is blocked on that myspace and can contact my mom but i thought why let a myspace go to waste. maybe my mom will use it hint hint lol be easier for her to look at things on there too.

Good Morning

2008-10-27T09:43:00.002-04:00

I some what slept last night

I have contact a prosecuting attorney and haven't heard from his SGT yet and well it is like 9 am so I know he wont be getting a hold of us until much later on in the day. I don't know if we can even afford to do this. But we are willing to put our self in hell hole debt maybe for this kid. The worse of it would be going into debt and finding it's not ours..

BUT Alot of people know and shes been running her mouth so I have been contacting family to tell them so we don't have a CRAP LOAD of people calling us telling us the same news we already know. Can't say this situation ain't affecting scott and I bc then I would be lying but it is. Not in a bad way either and we aren't arguing but I would just like to know how Scott feels and all he tells me its not his and that he wants to get this done. So that is that. I will update more later, I just felt like talking and sharing some feelings.

On a Lighter Note

2008-10-26T17:31:00.005-04:00

We took action. We got his SGT into this problem. We called him because we thought we had medical being part time and we don't. But since we thought we did we asked him if they would cover a DNA test. So I wrote her on myspace earlier just being upset. Then I wrote her and told her were taking Action and she wrote back scared as hell. This kid ain't Scott's and we know that. But to stop this from reoccurring again we are doing something about it.
His SGT is looking for a place for us to go. Possibly even free. So everything will be getting taken care of.
So I talked to Scott because well this kid is old as my nephew Clayton. Maybe alittle older but not by much like months tops one year. If it is his, We will fight for custody and hope we will get full and move take him with us and enjoy ourselves as a family. Obviously we wont leave till we get him also. This was before we started dating and I would like to welcome him into my family and as much as his if it is.
If this kid isn't his then we will turn to her and say was it really worth all of this. We will decided if we want to take her to court and make her stay far away from us.
We are going to try to best adults we could ever be. I will update you more tomorrow when SGT calls us back. He is suppose to call tomorrow.

I'm also posting on here the messages that were sent and a picture of the kid underneath you judge for your self. The mother is short chubby blondish brown hair.

Here is the lettering.

Us:

Hey,
We got a call today that you are claiming your child to be Scott's again? Does it ever end? This is what the third time? We know who the father is and so do you. But you dont like him/the real father and rather go after Scott. Very immature. You pay for the test and we will get it done and you will step out of our life again. Better hurry with the test because we are moving out of state soon. Army calls. So better hurry up.

Scott and Laura

Her:
How is he not scott's, He looked just like scott when he was a baby..I kno who's the daddy and Its your lovely husband, and No I don't like Scott and I will never like him..I have a man and Couldn't be any happier..Scott is in my past and Im happy he got married and that he is going into the service congrats on that..Im not immature..Im just trying to get scott to help with my son which his too, but if scott does not want anything to do with my son thats fine all he has to sign off him so my man can adopt him..

Scott and Laura:

you know what bring it? because if it is his, we will have custody. He HAS been in the service. We are moving, if you want this done lets get it done. Set it up call us, maybe we will pitch in half of what it cost, we have LIMITED TIME, So hurry it up.

Then I wrote back again saying,

Scott called his SGT and he is going to pull a couple strings and call around and see if we can get this done for free. So, we will write you back when we get told if he found anything. So we can get this done and out of the way. So all of this will stop.

Then she wrote:

Just tell Scott to sign of Mitch and we will be out of your lives forever and I will never bother you and him ever again

Then us:

No if this is Scotts kid we want to know for sure. We will be getting this testing done the legal way. His SGT will be contacting us back tomorrow with more information and then we will be getting ahold of you.

Then here is a picture of Mitch

Well never mind...She took me off of her friends list on myspace. So I will probably find some one to add her and send me a photo. I will post it for sure. She actually blocked me. So I will have to make another myspace to contact her with more information on the date and the testing. Then if she doesn't we will call the cops and get it appointed for it to happen. She has admitted it to us in the past that the kid isn't really Scotts and we know that. Maybe I will ask some one in the family to add her some one she don't know and save a picture of Mitch and send it to me because we would sort of like some pictures anyways. Just in case it is ours. Scott his SGT and I aren't going to let her walk away from us she started it, so were going to finish it like its suppose to end. So if you would like to add her or try send me a message and tell me and I will give you a link to her page. Thanks again its greatly appreciated.

Since Scott and I are trying to have kids and stress is the last thing I need so I'm trying so hard not to get stressed or to affect me on not having a baby.

Take Care Everyone
♥

I'm pissed

2008-10-26T15:56:00.002-04:00

There is this girl that keeps reoccuring in our life saying shit.
You know what go to fucking hell.
I have seen your boy and it's not scotts. You just want to screw him for child support and you know what go to god dam hell. you got that?
You ALREADY have admitted it wasn't his its just you can find his ex best friend that you dated and want to sign your child off to your future husband and then screw us with child support. Were not fucking dumb. I'm sick of you. This is your third attempt and im done.
Ha she just wrote me and said well he needs to man up and sign him away to her boyfriend of two weeks...GOSH I'M PISSED OFFF

Another Day

2008-10-24T11:32:00.004-04:00

Just cleaning today. Scott brought him this area rug and it was pretty dirty and now its looking really good. It covers most of the living room and it matches the color of our couch. I still have dishes to do and put some things up.
Scott and I have been thinking of some new MOS that are a bit safer.His job now is paid under the table didn't know that till last night. They write checks out and were going to copy the checks before cashing them. So if we ever get audited or what not we will have copy and stuff. He I guess does have weekends off. Saturday sometimes you have to work.
Soldier is being quite interesting today. Like he been rolling and sniffing our area rug and getting excited and then he learned that he can reach and peak out the window just barely but he can see some things lol. He also learned that if he stepped on the cat home that he can see even more.Soldier is also starting to weigh more and he is getting to heavy to lift now lol I rearranged the living room back to the old way. The living room looks a bit bigger too.It feels like home. =D
Also Scott brought home a window fan and its really cool like it hits a certain heat like summer it will kick on and run till it cools down. He also brought home a bird feeder for the kitties. They will LOVE that. We also got a little metal thing were we can hang up towels and stuff for the bathroom. He brought home a ninja star. The very first night, he was telling me he can bring stuff home. So I expected like he got something good and was excited to show me and I ask so what did you bring home he goes two rocks. I go rocks. He said yeah and pulls them out of his pocket. He says there smooth...rocks I could of picked rocks out of my driveway if i wanted to rocks LOL That would be my husband..LOL
I told him if he finds like a really nice microwave that has a defrost and its bigger than ours that would be nice! Or some more things around for our house. I was thinking maybe alittle rug for the animal room for the kitty litter so it gets on the rug and not everywhere else.
But yeah just been home really. Nothing to special.
I'm going to go back to make the house look pretty so scott can come home and dirty it
Take care
♥

I'm pretty scared

2008-10-22T19:02:00.002-04:00

Scott admitted to me the things he learned is pretty dam dangerous..then we were on myspace and like 4 or 5 people he hung with from his AIT are getting deployed in January. Same job as scott and all. I'm just alittle scared... I just want to be home with him 6 months before we move. I mean I know they only deploy if his whole area base thing he just got stationed at this weekend deploys. They haven't deployed in a long time. Just a fear I live with until we go full time bc it will put a HUGE damper in our plans. I dont want that. I dont care that scott is working 12 hours a day 7 days a week at his new job its just that I know that he is home, that he came home a few hours of the day and knowing he isnt MILIION miles away from me. Yesterday I spent two hours with scott and an hour this morning with him. His new job is 9am to whenever job with the already promise of 40 hours. So its like 40+ hour job..we didn't know that. Because of this job he hasn't really had anytime to work out. But he is constantly working all day and tearing shit out of houses. So I dont know how this whole thing is going to work out but we are going to make it work out somehow because scott gets tested once a month on his PT test if he is too busy ripping shit out and not running thats not good especally when he is so close of a promotion.Scott was told they have been let off of work around 3am 4 am sometimes and expect to be back at 9am that day... that has happened a few times. But its temp job Since it is only 6 months of it and I just PRAY AND HOPE that NOTHING happens before then.
The only pros of this job we will be able to afford bills and such but also whatever is left in the house the people that are cleaning up meaning scott and whoever is there has first bids on anything they want..So scott knew I wanted an area rug and he found one today but I hope that thing isnt but ugly or too big... ha our luck. he says it is dirty though but that is something i can easily take care of.
Just alittle worried today that is all. Alittle sad too since i found that out today.Scott doesn't know yet. But I'm going to clean a bit I have been playing fable 2 all dam day today it seems like
Take Care Everyone
♥

So

2008-10-21T14:49:00.003-04:00

I haven't posted in Awhile, I just wanted to say that were going to try to have a baby! I know its absolutely horrible timing but we want one.But coming pregnant isn't so easy with me. When I have an irregular period and being over weight. The overweight we have been working out here and there. When he is up too it. Since he does have to keep up with his own. But everything's been working out quite well. I think I have a site that ask TONS of questions and then they give you when they think you are ovulating and when you should start your period down to when you should start feeling cramps. =D So if my period wants to me constantly irregular we have some dates labeled down. There is also this body temperature thing every morning and record it. It has alot of cool stuff. So,yeah. We picked up some Halloween candy last night mmmm lol its for the kids and we liked passing candy out last year.
And if im not getting pregnant with those dates is because I need to loose more weight. So yeah pretty interesting.
I'm fully ready for active duty. I have been thinking easy ways to pack and what stuff we are going to take. What things were going to get before we leave. I'm thrilled to leave this never ending people need to know what people are still up to drama.
We still need to make some family visits soon. We keep pushing them off because Scott got that new job and we want to get rent saved before we do anything. He will be making about 300-400 a week. So thats is good! Subway it was that in two weeks. Today is his first day also.
So if you are reading and your family, I really hope I get pregnant in the next few months haha. It's not easy and I know but Were ready to have a kid. So hopefully you will be an aunt uncle grandma again sometime! It's my promise.
Well take care everyone I got to clean...fun fun House is messy and Scott hasn't been keeping up after himself. It's amazing how fast this house gets dirty.
♥
Trying to stay away from the candy...LOL
<---- I want to be a mom!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Feels Good

2008-10-18T13:11:00.003-04:00

being home alone and Scott gone. It's very nice. He has his one weekend a month and then forgot some papers had to come back his sgt gave him gas money so that helped and then he comes into the house the door closes loud like and i got scared went in the hallway and double fist ready to fight bc i thought some one was breaking in I woke up from dead sleep bc of the door and i was getting ready to get soldier out and i hear hunny were are my papers...dam it scott lol I was ready to come down stairs and beat the living shit out of you and sick the dog haha
But its soo nice im home alone its very nice. It will only be today bc he will be home at like 8 am tomorrow but he gets paid like 160 for this weekend which is cool and all. we wont get it for like 7-10 days but still it helps.
well im going to laze around and do nothing =D

Learning

2008-10-16T19:20:00.002-04:00

Alright, Ignore that whole get your husband out there. BAD Idea.Could be a good idea for your husband BUT not mine. We had to go shopping today bc of yesterday incident and he was just getting angry. He can't stand going into big places like that and he told me the only reason I'm in this store is because your in here.You know that is sweet and all, but he gets annoyed. I will ask him things he wants or what he would like. Or anything like that he was just like whatever get what you want. Sort of like get this done and get out of here. He looks at the Civilians and gets pissed off. He looks at food and gets pissed off. He might as well just turned to me and said, I can't stand looking at any one in this store because well there civilians. He is more comfortable more himself being stuck on a base with people than civilians. He is so thrilled this weekend for his Army one weekend a month, but of just hating whats around him now. He likes being home and things like that. He hates he has to tear himself from me to head to Subway. He is more than ready to go full time now. He isn't liking any place passed our house. Unless family houses or a restaurant to eat at.
All of this not adjusting or doesn't want too, is weird. I hate taking him somewhere with me. I can leave by myself and keep him at home but he will ask what im doing or doesn't want to be left alone really. Or wants to spend time with me. Which is fine, I can deal with it. It's just weird or odd.
Other than that Today has went pretty well. I'm just really going to relax today and do well whateva I feel like.Haven't heard anything from jobs yet, I have my fingers crossed.
Well Tomorrow we are going to go fishing and just hang out. He has tomorrow off but he works his one weekend a month this weekend which annoyed his manager kim at subway even though scott is going day by day schedule. So she has to deal with it haha Hopefully scott will feel better after this one weekend a month. If not he can look forward to them and moving.
Well take care everyone
♥

Scott is working

2008-10-15T21:13:00.004-04:00

So I have time to be on here.
Today has went excellent. He turns to me and goes I wish i got paid every day to spend with you. You make me nothing but happy. I was happy and he said this day is an excellent day and one of those i don't want to leave you and go work at "boring subway" He said he has never felt so lazy at life at work. He hates subway. It's so easy it bores him. Well why he liked it before he left bc it was easy and now hes back its so easy he don't want to be there. We have been doing applications. Scott also might be working two jobs. He has a job offer, he has to go and fill out an application and get an interview first. But its pretty much a given. That job doesn't seem to us a reliable job so he will be working both jobs. The job that is pretty much a given is cleaning out foreclosure homes for 8 an hour. What if they run out of houses? yeah so it doesn't seem so reliable. I mean we will only have the job till we leave state, but we need one. Our rent is raised this up coming month and we are trying to save. Also the job gets paid every week and that is nice. very nice. We filled out for some online things. There is a place called cintas. Its a uniform company and hopefully he gets into there. That would be AWESOME! But we will see!
So far trying to keep the house clean and just cleaning after your self isn't working so great in our house. I would like a schedule to work with on daily things to do like before Scott came home. Now its a different and weird. Things aren't getting done. Still alot of organizing. There is so much army stuff WOW enough to fill my closet!
Scott went into the grocery store today. He didn't like it. We were shopping and we have saved 200 for groceries. We are gathering stuff and scott was suppose to keep an estimate in his head of what he had in the cart since i forgot my calculator well he got upset at like prices of things he stopped counting and just allowed me to pick up stuff i usually pick up. He says okay i think we should go now, i stare at him and i go what do you mean? this is not 200 of groceries i know what that looks like. He goes well it looks over 200 to me. I go well then i will put the odd and end stuff back bc i wasnt done picking stuff up so im not buying stuff for no reason. he got upset with that and i said sorry but im not paying for something i cant make. so got annoyed with that but he knew i was right. I only put back like 3 things. Nuts sour cream and cream cheese. I was going to make my potato things. Well we check out and it was....90.66 and I glared at him and i was like told ya so,Now lets go. haha he didn't say anything all the way to the car and we got in he goes im sorry and i go that's fine, i will do shopping later on don't worry about it. He goes just a lot of prices went up since i was gone, i swore we were over. I go well you have been getting stuff at a cheaper price too and i have been living like i have since you left me. I know how much we have. He said sorry, I'm not just use to it. I told him I understand and which i did. Awkward moments of the day lol But now i have to do grocery shopping again and pick up things i put back, he was just ready to go home. He did say its weird seeing tons of people in civilian clothes. So if it wasn't the actually groceries being high prices it was just him not comfortable. I sort of knew that and that's why i said lets go home.
Yeah we have been going through some mix emotions with Scott. I'm not allowed to take his dog tags off. When he does have them off, he isn't himself. He feels for them constantly. There on 247. I understand to the best of my knowledge why in ways it affects him. But its a big affect. When he turns to me and looks at me and tells me its him its who he is. I turned to him today and asked if there were things that he cant tell me and he said yes. I go can I get them out of you he goes you can die trying. I go what if you were blown up? he goes i will be alright. I go how can you be alright if you were blown up. He goes i'm soldier I'm Scott I can beat anything I go you cant beat death. He goes i was told to tell wives and close ones that I will be alright I can not give you any more information passed that. I go okay but your my husband aren't I suppose to know what is passed that, he goes I will be alright.Now when i asked him questions like this bc millions of questions go through my head, the way he answers makes me feel like I dont know him. The side I will never ever know about Scott. Which im total and utterly fine about. But this is one thing that it makes it feel like your standing next to some one else a soldier not your love of your life.
If I would give any advice from my one week experience of him being home, I would say to get him out there. Let him get use to the civilian world. dont put too much on his lap like surprises. Make sure he sees everyone he cares about. Even if they are just a picture.Give him space. I know you miss him but back off.Learn about him. Communicate. tons of sex haha Make sure he is happy and understands everything. Give him time, they will come around. Dont forget to share your feelings, If I have learned anything from my husband is that To share it all even if I dont feel like its actually him next to me tell him that seriously. They will help out. If you are the rock of your husband while he was gone, he will do everything in his will power to make it better. That right there made me adjust to my husband in a heart beat. One things Scott has ALWAYS told me since he was gone, bc it was told to him. Wife First Army Second. No man can do there job if there not stable. There wife keeps them stable and make sure he is always happy. Do your job as a wife.
Love em Support em.
Take Care
♥

Alrighty

2008-10-14T09:43:00.003-04:00

I'm going to get caught up on this today. Scott is gone running and I need to start cleaning on this house, but right now im relaxing because my stomach hurts pretty bad. All the food of us eating out is getting to me. I'm glad it's all done with though.
So at the airport, We seen each other. We cried. At that moment I realized a lot of people were staring because he is in uniform. Then he introduced me to a girl he did AIT with and I sort of ignored her. Well I said hello shook her hand and turned to my husband and put all my attention to him. I didn't realize it till afterward it was just i have not seen my husband in so long.When I hugged him for the first time, it was like I wasn't hugging Scott. I was hugging some one but not him. Im amazed at how good he looks and how much he doesn't look like the guy that left me. When I use to hug him my arms just fit and he was a teddy bear like. Now when i hug him my arms can wrap around like 5 times. He is very skinny. Then we got home and he seen the house he was more into me than the house. Then he met soldier. He got annoyed with him at first, but as in today he loves em. Then we went to just lay in bed catch up. That didnt even seem right. I know its my husband next to me but it felt like i was laying in my bed with a stranger. I couldn't sleep within that fact. I was up alot and he was snoring in and out. I felt odd. That feeling hurt me so bad because I knew my husband and that was/wasnt him. I left the bed. I couldn't lay there bc it wasn't him.
The next day, I had to confront my feelings. I couldn't hold them. I slept for 2 hours and ran that whole day like that. We talked he took a pillow and stuffed in his shirt and said come here with his arms open and I gave him a hug and it felt like the one I knew. Use to knew. That's when I just balled.That's when it hit me my husband is home. He is saying sorry and trying to understand, but he doesn't.Hurt him alittle bit. I constantly could watch him what he was doing. I looked at him alot during that day. I held him a lot without the pillow and had to get my self to say this is him. The more time I spent with him the easier it got. I started seeing the Scott I knew. Just in a new improved body. Then within that day I realized that my husband has a mouth. He is cocky. That was pretty interesting. He stands up for him self finally. Then People starting showing up for Dinner. Dinner went well. Scott acted out a few times while in uniform and I told him. He knew I said something but at the moment it didn't affect him. Then while i was eating I looked up and there is this guy staring at me. He was a big guy in red shirt big ears. He is eating staring at me. I kept eating i looked over he is staring at me. Im ignoring it, I did got my second plate then my third of just legs. Then I looked over he is still staring at me. Scott looked at me and realized im really uncomfortable, I told him ill be back im going to get some crackers. He followed me. He asked whats up and I said im getting watched even down to the point of me eating. I'm like take it as a compliment babe. He got offensive with me and said no your not conformable this is a family dinner. I go just watch he will eventually leave. In which he did Scott whispered in my ear as i looked down he was tightening his fist and said I want to kick his ass so bad. I'm like omg bc Scott I know NEVER would of done this. But the guy finally left. That was the worse part of the dinner I planned for family. Other than that the food was good. Only one pair of our friends showed up. But I can tell EVERYONE had a good time and that is what I wanted.
Then I had the surprise later on that night, That went pretty well. He liked it alot and kept saying it. He didn't cry and didn't say I was beautiful like the way i pictured the night didn't turn out at all. The surprise was suppose to be at the baseball field and there was no room bc of a football game. So I took him to the soccer field. He found the area of his star but it was bright enough yet for the sky. I dressed up and everything. All I got was a wow that he liked it. I was actually terribly disappointed at first, but I had to let it go or it would ruin my surprise moment and it went well actually after i let it go. I wouldn't suggest a surprise so soon of some one being home. Or your probably not going to get the reacting like you want. He also found out which way I was going. That sucked he knew he was in Owosso but didn't know where.
Then the next day we didn't have a wedding reception because it got canceled so that was that.
Then Sunday we woke up really early, like around 7 am. NOTHING I'm use too haha. Im use to like around 11am and then he calls it sleeping in at 7am.
Well we went into town ate together caught up at some places. Visited others and took off back into Lansing and then went home. Justin didnt drink at all for his birthday. Which is cool, his choice.but yeah I would say things have gone great.
We had to drive to subway today he had to work today and we went fishing on the river thing in Lansing. We believe he has to work this weekend and if not then we are going to drive up north.
Also we had some leakage going on in our bathroom. We have been pretty busy and this last Monday and Saturday were our relaxing days. We been going to bed early and waking up early.
Today is trash day and other things need to get done. Ugh I can't wait where things are flowing going well then trying to relax eat seem on the go.
But we are going to come into town though this week dont know when. We are going to go in for I dont know why...LOL But we are we are going grocery shopping too. Since there is a bigger aldis in Owosso. Don't have much for groceries. We are looking for other jobs for Scott. We need to find out how much it will cost for Scott to turn in his card at Secretary of State saying he has passed for the CDL Class A card. Get that done hopefully he wont have to do a civilian one. We dont think so but he might. Each state is different too. Which is gay.
But I got to go
Take Care Everyone
♥

Changes

2008-10-11T22:30:00.005-04:00

My husband is home now and things are going better.
We had a good first night a bad morning a great afternoon and night.
My surprise went well. He didn't cry or tell me how beautiful I was so I guess I didnt stand out but He did sit there is say wow. Said omg I have always wanted to have one named after me. Then since a football game was going on and everyone was parked at the baseball field i couldnt exactly do that so i went to the soccer field. Then i made a few trips then took him out lit a candle grabbed the map of his star and told him to look. He loved the food and the drink. Thank you aunt sylvia for helping out.
Then after that today we relaxed and caught up really. We have to get to know each other, because obviously standing around him you can feel he has changed.
He walked passed me at the airport and didn't see me. Then we met and cried right there. Everyone was staring and sort of left us alone. But god Scott grabs so much attention. He is cocky person now. I love it, I like getting told into place. Makes me learn.
Then as of today, we went for a "walk" we did work outs before hand and then took off and he had me marching left right left and swinging my arms like 6 inches in front 9 inches in the back. Or the other way around...lol He got me saying some cadences with him. I'm learning im a clutz and i have to pay attention more. At the end I started just doing what I had to do to get done bc he wasnt giving up and he wasnt letting my laugh get to him. He was saying this cadences where talking about things being bubbley and end up going to farts and i stopped and busted up bc thats the last thing i expected. he stood there and told me to take him seriously.
But I have to go now he walked in, We have to get some stuff down around the house when I get a chance later on the week when he is working. I will have an oober long update on me and then an update on advice for military wives that are new.
Take Care Everyone
♥

Can't wait to post next :]
I'm so glad he is doing work outs with me.

TODAY

2008-10-09T10:52:00.004-04:00

is the day, I will be doing finishing touches today. Like dishes vacuum and try my dress on. Yes I got it today and my massager. Perfect timing I'll say.
I know later on I will be shutting this computer off and when Scott is home i will be unplugging my phone. I don't want to deal with no one today or tomorrow till its time.
Well My dress is alittle see through.. I don't have a dress slip or anything. But I will find a white bra and underwear. That will have to be good enough. It looks like it will fit me too.
I'm going to try it on and pack it away in my bag till tomorrow comes. then I'm going to work on my finishing touches. So I got things to do.
Take Care Everyone
♥

this will be my last post for a few days also.thought id give ya the heads up

Well

2008-10-08T22:34:00.003-04:00

I have posted a fucking lot, HERES ANOTHER!!! Tomorrow baby, Tomorrow!! I shouldn't post like a hundred tomorrow I promise ;] I'm fairly excited and yet nervous.
He will be home and be in my arms tomorrow night and I can sleep. Well not really I'm going to HOPE he sleeps in and I make it make sure the mail man doesn't delivery my dress with him seeing it Friday. Hopefully the mailman has it for me tomorrow. Scott wont be making it in till like 11 pm. He rides a bus most of the way that is why it is a long ride. Go figure. But he is coming home and that is all that matters.
Then If he is still in bed I'm going to give him whatever i can mix up for breakfast in bed. Probably the homemade jam and toast. That's about it. Well pancakes I can do. Sounds good. hopefully it goes well.
He said he would call tonight but its alittle late now and no call.
So I'm going to try to go to bed early, so we will see haha. Probably not. I'm finally working on earth tone color blanket. It's going to take forever because I'm using a smaller crochet needle. So MUCH MUCH LONGER but something to do :]
Well Cya
♥